Skip to main content

Home/ s10writ340_930/ Group items tagged done

Rss Feed Group items tagged

glnnrivera

FAFSA - Free Application for Federal Student Aid - 0 views

shared by glnnrivera on 18 Feb 10 - Cached
  •  
    We all know about this
Scott Prentice

College Applications - Tips, Advice, and College Application Requirements - 0 views

  •  
    done
Mark Marino

Is Google Making Us Stupid? - Magazine - The Atlantic - Nicholas Carr - 11 views

  • tinkering with my brain, remapping the neural circuitry, reprogramming the memory.
    • bamk340
       
      I like his use of metaphor in this sentence, comparing his brain with the computer.
  • Now I zip along the surface like a guy on a Jet Ski.
    • bamk340
       
      similie, very vivid!
  • “bounce”
    • bamk340
       
      use of slang, fitting when talking about contemporary culture.
  • ...50 more annotations...
  • The human brain is just an outdated computer that needs a faster processor and a bigger hard drive.
    • bamk340
       
      carrying through with this computer-brain metaphor
  • . Now my concentration often starts to drift after two or three pages.
    • Scott Prentice
       
      This is exactly how I have been starting to feel because after years of browsing the internet. He hit the nail right on the head.
  • Still, their easy assumption that we’d all “be better off” if our brains were supplemented, or even replaced, by an artificial intelligence is unsettling. It suggests a belief that intelligence is the output of a mechanical process, a series of discrete steps that can be isolated, measured, and optimized
    • Scott Prentice
       
      The problem with this assumption is that the author assumes it is within Page and Brin's agenda to formulate ideas and decisions for us. He states that it is a possibility that they would like to replace our our minds with artificial intelligence.
  • Just as there’s a tendency to glorify technological progress, there’s a countertendency to expect the worst of every new tool or machine.
    • Scott Prentice
       
      This is what my initial thought of what this article was going to be about; just another person problematizing a situation.
    • morgan macbride
       
      This is especially true but I dont think we are expecting the worst of this new technology, I just think we are understanding the possible negative implications it can have on our everyday life
  • He feared that, as people came to rely on the written word as a substitute for the knowledge they used to carry inside their heads, they would, in the words of one of the dialogue’s characters, “cease to exercise their memory and become forgetful.”
    • Scott Prentice
       
      This is a very interesting factoid.
  • I’m not the only one. When I mention my troubles with reading to friends and acquaintances—literary types, most of them—many say they’re having similar experiences.
    • Scott Prentice
       
      Again, this is similar to how I feel and how my friends appear to act sometimes. It is something that I've felt but I've just never been again to put my finger on it.
  • we may well be reading more today than we did in the 1970s or 1980s, when television was our medium of choice
    • Scott Prentice
       
      I'm sure the same issue arose during the popularization of television and its tendency to push individuals away from literacy.
  • Even a blog post of more than three or four paragraphs is too much to absorb. I skim it.”
    • Scott Prentice
       
      After speaking to a friend about how websites and the content within are formed, it is supposedly forbidden to write long paragraphs and such. Most content is writen in the form of bullent point and short paragraphs that are written to get directly to the point.
  • As the late MIT computer scientist Joseph Weizenbaum  observed in his 1976 book, Computer Power and Human Reason: From Judgment to Calculation, the conception of the world that emerged from the widespread use of timekeeping instruments “remains an impoverished version of the older one, for it rests on a rejection of those direct experiences that formed the basis for, and indeed constituted, the old reality.” In deciding when to eat, to work, to sleep, to rise, we stopped listening to our senses and started obeying the clock.
    • cdcrone
       
      There might be something to be said for "obeying the clock," though - the shift from "listening to our gut," to a more calculated and precise view of the world seems like it would be helpful in terms of scientific thought and progress.
  • The result is to scatter our attention and diffuse our concentration.
    • cdcrone
       
      Perhaps, though in any case, the desire for more knowledge is nothing new. One might argue that, to a certain extent, breath without depth can help people reach a fuller view of a particular subject, and then, if they need/want to, it is also easy to find those lengthier sources.
  • That’s the essence of Kubrick’s dark prophecy: as we come to rely on computers to mediate our understanding of the world, it is our own intelligence that flattens into artificial intelligence.
    • cdcrone
       
      Though the article brings up good points to think about, it is all canclled out for me with this over-dramatic statement. *sigh*
    • morgan macbride
       
      i believe its a little overdramatic too
  • As we are drained of our “inner repertory of dense cultural inheritance,” Foreman concluded, we risk turning into “‘pancake people’—spread wide and thin as we connect with that vast network of information accessed by the mere touch of a button.”
    • cdcrone
       
      Pancakes are tasty, yet dense, and can be healthy for you if you use the right ingredients and toppings. Who is to say that this new spreading out of culture is bad? Perhaps it is encouraging people to learn about things that they wouldn't have thought of before. The links out encourage new processes and connections to information previously unconnected. Especially at USC, where there is even a scholarship for those majoring in two seemingly unrelated disciplines at the same time, there is agreement that subjects previously thought to be unrelated can both be helped by a union of science and art. The Renaissance was full of those "pancake people," people striving to know and learn about the place they lived and how they thought about it. Do we think of the Renaissance as a time where people cast down depth of knowledge? The other side of the pancake is tempting indeed.
  • "Dave, stop. Stop, will you? Stop, Dave. Will you stop, Dave?”
    • taylorcornelson
       
      Imagery, classic film reference, and a poignant example of the fear of computers in the 21st century. Could you ask for a better opening line?
  • The deep reading that used to come naturally has become a struggle.
    • taylorcornelson
       
      I've definitely had this feeling too.
  • Reading, explains Wolf, is not an instinctive skill for human beings
    • taylorcornelson
       
      Very interesting hypothesis... I've wondered this myself when on page 700 of "War And Peace."
  • “You are right,” Nietzsche replied, “our writing equipment takes part in the forming of our thoughts.”
    • taylorcornelson
       
      As a student of architecture, I can see many parallels between this example and new computer-based architecture programs that are fundamentally changing the ways architects design.
  • “systematize everything”
    • taylorcornelson
       
      Exhilarating, yet terrifying.
  • The idea that our minds should operate as high-speed data-processing machines is not only built into the workings of the Internet, it is the network’s reigning business model as well.
    • taylorcornelson
       
      He raises an interesting point - but is this the way our minds were meant to work, and have other forms of media merely been restrictive in their relatively slow output of information?
  • HAL’s outpouring of feeling contrasts with the emotionlessness that characterizes the human figures in the film, who go about their business with an almost robotic efficiency.
    • taylorcornelson
       
      This is a great summation of the incredible eloquence of Kubrick's masterful film, a metaphor which operates very well in the context of this article.
  • It almost seems that they go online to avoid reading in the traditional sense.
    • Dongoh Kim
       
      This is very true. I was also feeling this way. People is trying to avoid reading in traditional way. They only want to absorb informations that are simple, easy, and fast. It was like they are getting lazy and lazy over time.
    • cdcrone
       
      like simple english wikipedia?
  • When we read online, she says, we tend to become “mere decoders of information.”
    • Dongoh Kim
       
      This "mere decoders of information" is so true! Since decoding information is to understand, break down, and interpret sets of communication and infromation in our brain clearly, reading online is trying to jump this process really fast.
  • It’s becoming our map and our clock, our printing press and our typewriter, our calculator and our telephone, and our radio and TV.
    • Dongoh Kim
       
      I cannot argue a single word in this sentence. Internet and computer is not becoming, it is our part of life.
  • “Dave, my mind is going,” HAL says, forlornly. “I can feel it. I can feel it.”
    • tommyalexander
       
      powerful use of quotes from the film - causes an association with the feeling you get when watching the scene
  • The Web has been a godsend to me as a writer. Research that once required days in the stacks or periodical rooms of libraries can now be done in minutes.
    • tommyalexander
       
      he acknowledges the good parts about the internet before beginning his main argument
  • The faster we surf across the Web—the more links we click and pages we view—the more opportunities Google and other companies gain to collect information about us and to feed us advertisements.
  • The last thing these companies want is to encourage leisurely reading or slow, concentrated thought. It’s in their economic interest to drive us to distraction.
    • morgan macbride
       
      very interesting concept
    • morgan macbride
       
      its all about marketing and not conveying any messages
  • As people’s minds become attuned to the crazy quilt of Internet media, traditional media have to adapt to the audience’s new expectations. Television programs add text crawls and pop-up ads, and magazines and newspapers shorten their articles, introduce capsule summaries, and crowd their pages with easy-to-browse info-snippets.
    • sunmeeholmes
       
      Imagery. It's like a domino effect...once we've become used to power browsing through the internet we expect the same thing from all other types of media.
  • “I now have almost totally lost the ability to read and absorb a longish article on the web or in print,
    • morgan macbride
       
      so many applications has shortened my attention span has dramatically shortened
  • But it’s a different kind of reading, and behind it lies a different kind of thinking—perhaps even a new sense of the self
    • glnnrivera
       
      The focus of online reading is drastically differnt from reading traditional text. Close-readings are not all too common--the prevalence of quick-reading reflects our obssession with immediate satisfaction. Personally, I find reading on the computer can be rather straining, so I do find myself skimming a lot to get through whatever I'm reading(without printing). I'm sure there are a lot of other reasons this is the case. But, as the author mentions, a new way of thinking comes derives from this reading method. The author suggests that we don't make the same deep connections reading online these days. Ths is presented as resding light and an unsettling direction which is even a threat to "self." Incorporating identity in the argument lends power to the article.
  • Sometime in 1882, Friedrich Nietzsche bought a typewriter
    • tommyalexander
       
      interesting start to the paragraph
  • And because they would be able to “receive a quantity of information without proper instruction,” they would “be thought very knowledgeable when they are for the most part quite ignorant.”
    • mkbusc
       
      This is a frightening idea that long ago they were worried that reading books would fill people with knowledge when they weren't knowledgeable. Now we face bigger problems because less people are reading because their focus has shifted to more unimportant issues.
  • Last year, Page told a convention of scientists that Google is “really trying to build artificial intelligence and to do it on a large scale.”
  • “Certainly if you had all the world’s information directly attached to your brain, or an artificial brain that was smarter than your brain, you’d be better off.”
  • For me, as for others, the Net is becoming a universal medium, the conduit for most of the information that flows through my eyes and ears and into my mind.
    • morgan macbride
       
      very true
  • Then again, the Net isn’t the alphabet, and although it may replace the printing press, it produces something altogether different. The kind of deep reading that a sequence of printed pages promotes is valuable not just for the knowledge we acquire from the author’s words but for the intellectual vibrations those words set off within our own minds.
    • sunmeeholmes
       
      Seeking out information on the internet or through books is different, not necessarily a matter of what is a better way of gaining knowledge. They are different processes altogether so our experiences will be different. We're not learning less from the internet, we're just learning in a different context.
  • Never has a communications system played so many roles in our lives—or exerted such broad influence over our thoughts—as the Internet does today.
    • morgan macbride
       
      this is especially true for me, there is no time in the day i am not checking my email, text, or facebook. They have become an interactive schedule planner that seem never to turn off
  • I think I know what’s going on.
  • "Dave, stop. Stop, will you? Stop, Dave. Will you stop, Dave?
  • malfunctioning machine
  • Over the pa
  • Dave, stop. Stop, will you? Stop, Dave. Will you stop, Dave
  • "Dave, stop. Stop, will you? Stop, Dave. Will you stop, Dave?”
  • brain
  • Nicholas Carr
  • The Atlantic Home Monday, September 12, 2011 Go Follow the Atlantic » Politics Business Entertainment International Technology National Life Magazine video Presented By Obama to Congress: Pass My Jobs Bill Immediately Julia Edwards 2012 Candidates as Active NFL Players Chris Good Why Perry Could Win on Social Security Matthew Dowd Presented by // // What if Americans Don't Want More Stimulus? Daniel Indiviglio America's Jobs Crisis in 17 Charts aut
  • "Dave, stop. Stop, will you? Stop, Dave. Will you stop, Dave?
  • g nearly been sent to
  • What the Internet is d
  • Making
  • supercomp
  •  
    "Never has a communications system played so many roles in our lives-or exerted such broad influence over our thoughts-as the Internet does today." This idea is extremely true in my life as I feel much of my communication is via text, facebook, or email. I at times almost finding myself losing touch with reality and physical contact and becoming complacent sending some non emotional or important information to a friend. The lack of physical communication can at times make me feel like a recluse. But at the same time, the easy and quick nature of this new technology almost makes it difficult to go back to the way things were
  • ...1 more comment...
  •  
    "Just as there's a tendency to glorify technological progress, there's a countertendency to expect the worst of every new tool or machine." This too is another really important point, the efficiency of the Net and other sources via the computer should not entirely take the place of reading of books and other sorts of literature that existed far before the Net. Much of what I read on the Net is useless chit chat that is merely for my entertainment. And the useful and thought provoking information on the Net is simply a copy of literature from a book or a law journal, it just is easier to access on my computer from my bed. In this regard, the Net is a great service, you just have to remember what information is useful and what information is not.
  •  
    The recurring theme that the Net is an extension allowing Google and other companies to feed us more advertisements and learn more about us is somewhat startling. The fact that every website and email we write can be tracked and looked at is a little invasive to say the least. In this sense, the Net's alluring attractions are also a trick to market us and use our information to exploit our monies.
  •  
    The focus of online reading is drastically different from traditional text. Close-readings are not as common--the prevalence of quick-reading reflects the obssession with immediate satisfaction. Personally, I find reading on the computer can be straining, so I do find myself skimming a lot just to get through whatever I'm reading(without printing). I'm sure there are a lot of other reasons this is the case.But, as the author brings up, we also think differently. The author suggests that we don't make the same deep connections in reading. This is presented as reading light and an unsettling direction.
matekat60

Wilson's Biology Lab - The Blog: Will Genetic Juicing Replace Steroids? - 0 views

    • matekat60
       
      He is educate d in the topic because he knows that athletes are under constant pressute to be the best because theat is what they live from
  • Gene therapy is the practice of inserting different genes into the cells to improve their performance
    • matekat60
       
      Detail to know about gene manipulation shows sis knowladge
  • ...6 more annotations...
  • Because the genes are foreign material, people's immune system may reject the gene and destroy it, causing the operation to fail. If the operation is done poorly enough, the immune system's response may be severe enough to kill the patient (i.e., shutting down organs, including the brain). Also, gene therapy does not last for a long period of time, so multiple operations are required until the therapy actually works and cures the patient.
    • matekat60
       
      Detailed knowladge about the topic and he goes in depth about gene therapy so he knows what he is talking about
  • In 2006, a German track and field coach tried to allow genetic juicing to his athletes for the 2008 Olympics in China, but was caught before anyone could be treated. In an attempt to stop genetic manipulation in athletics, the World Anti-Doping Agenc
    • matekat60
       
      Gives good and interesting example from the world of athletics how coaches tempted to give illegal and dangerous stuff to their athletes just to improve their performance.
  • http://www.scientificamerican.com/blog/post.cfm?id=athlete-alert-is-genetic-juicing-se-2010-02-04http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gene_therapyhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesse_Gelsinger
    • matekat60
       
      sources are good way to show where you get your informations and give you inspirations
cdcrone

Against the Odds with Admissions Gods - 0 views

shared by cdcrone on 03 Feb 10 - Cached
  • “Left undiscussed, however, is how much unnecessary discrimination against whites and Asians is necessary in order to maintain the attendance of minorities.”
    • Nicole Tam
       
      I'm not sure that this quote is the best to show that she has a strong stance against affirmative action. I thought this was stated in a confusing way, but beyond that my interpretation of this quote was that discrimination against asians and whites was necessary to keep minorities in law schools. She might be stronger about her dislike for affirmative action throughout the blog, but this quote doesn't capture that sentiment to me.
  • These statistics are also adding a taste of cynicism to her voice; as many law schools deny the magnitude of affirmative action, her proof blatantly contradicts these assertions.
    • Nicole Tam
       
      I think the use of statistics adds to both her argument and yours. It helps support your argument, and gives more authority to your voice.
  • What happens to the poor white men and women? Nothing good. This improper use of a once beneficial program completely undermines the foundations of equality and the incentive to work hard for those that will be adversely affected by affirmative action.
    • Nicole Tam
       
      Your use of language and the question helped to make your opinion extremely clear. You have some strong opinons, especially because this issue is personal for you, and I think it's great that your voice is as strong as your opinions.
  • ...2 more annotations...
  • If you follow this line of reasoning, affirmative action or preferential treatment should not look at race, but rather family income and one’s socioeconomics.
    • Nicole Tam
       
      This is a really interesting point to make. I never really thought about affirmative action in terms of socioeconomic.
    • cdcrone
       
      I agree...the way you present the article and the flow of your own voice really help present this as a new option. Instead of just complaining about something and offering no solutions, you offer something that seems logical. This logical reasoning makes your post read much more powerfully.
  • Her words and voice shall enlighten the many ignorant who naively call opponents to affirmative racist.
    • cdcrone
       
      The strong finish here makes me want to come back and read more.
  •  
    "Her words and voice shall enlighten the many ignorant who naively call opponents to affirmative racist. America is a land of opportunity, freedom, and most importantly equality. It is the barbaric mechanisms of discrimination such as affirmative action, that erode the perilous work America has done to establish itself as the great country it is today." This clearly shows my voice and my tone towards the issue of affirmative action
tommyalexander

Nike: Greek Goddess of Confiscating Tapes (annotated) - 0 views

  • So you probably know by now
    • tommyalexander
       
      Immediately starts off with a conversational voice. By saying "you probably know by now", the reader knows that whatever he is talking about has been in the news. It makes the reader want to know what happened, if they don't already.
  • Crawford took the ball at James, they both jumped
    • tommyalexander
       
      He starts off by describing an actual basketball play. This sets up the sarcasm and humor in the rest of the paragraph.
  • then another 360, then he took off one of his shoes and bonked James in the head with it, put the shoe back on, pulled out a shaving cream pie and shoved that in James face, took out a bottle of seltzer water and sprayed James, then he poked James in the eye Three Stooges style, then he came up with a quick hip hop song called “Be Gone Lebron,” then he pinched James’ cheek, beat James at thumb wrestling, gave James a wedgie and, finally, dunked the ball, two-handed, rattling the rim, while James cried like a child lost at the mall.
    • tommyalexander
       
      The rest of the paragraph is extremely exaggerated, obviously sarcastic remarks about what Jordan Crawford must have done in the air before dunking on Lebron. His sarcasm is related to the point of the article which is alluded to in the title. His description includes a combination of both actual basketball terms as well as just random references
  • ...13 more annotations...
  • NOBODY
    • tommyalexander
       
      He continues his conversational voice by predicting what the reader is probably thinking. His use of all caps implies a voice inflection. You imagine the word "nobody" being said with a large amount of disbelief.
  • PHONES
    • tommyalexander
       
      Once again the use of all caps makes the reader imagine this word being said with disbelief. Also talking about cameras on phones gives the context of the writer's age. While cameras on phones are a relatively recent creation, young people don't tend to talk about cameras on phones with a sense of disbelief. This implies the writer has been around for some time
  • Well, no, there were people filming it
  • the Nike official called out his Nike storm troopers, who promptly ran around the place shooting lasers and confiscating any and all tapes of the offending dunk
    • tommyalexander
       
      Using a pop culture reference for humor. He could have just said "Nike sent some officials out to confiscate the tape". Instead he chose this way which is very rich in imagery.
  • Animal Farmish
    • tommyalexander
       
      Reference to the novel Animal Farm by Orwell. Conjures images of out of control governments and the loss of rights. Dystopia
  • — happiness, in this case, being our unalienable right to laugh at LeBron
    • tommyalexander
       
      Uses a dash to abruptly change the tone from serious to humorous.
  • loved that slogan
    • tommyalexander
       
      He chooses to use parentheses here instead of a dash because this thought is unrelated to his flow of words. Also, the pop culture reference to "Just Do It"
  • *It’s ZAY-vee-ur. Not ex-ZAY-vee-ur.
    • tommyalexander
       
      A funny aside. Once again he uses humor to make his voice stand out.
  • to comfort the comfortable, to afflict the afflicted, to keep someone as beloved as LeBron James off of YouTube. I mean, what?
    • tommyalexander
       
      Once again he is using sarcasm. Interesting word choice comfort->comfortable, afflict->afflicted
  • THE LeBron James
    • tommyalexander
       
      by using all caps in the word "the" the reader knows to say it as "thee" in their head
  • Personally, I think they should …
    • tommyalexander
       
      He closes of the post by basically making a list of all of Nike's misfortunes/failures from the last several years. Because it's always funny to laugh at the misfortunes of others...
  • confiscate his entire career as a basketball executive
    • tommyalexander
       
      ouch
  • Confiscate Matt Leinart
    • tommyalexander
       
      HARSH!
Lauren Goehner

Celebrity Cosmetic Surgery: Heidi Montag - Plastic Surgery Addiction - 0 views

  • What the heck is going on here?
    • Lauren Goehner
       
      The use of a rhetorical question combined with his informal language ("heck") develops his tone on the subject. It conveys his confusion, and a feeling of absurdity, almost more so than if he had simply said, "What?" or even "What the hell?".
  • Here's what I think about the ten procedures she's had done:
    • Lauren Goehner
       
      His straight forward manner set's up the rest of the post, and is echoed in his opinions. Short, concise, and to the point sentences can be found throughout this post.
  • unnecessary. It looked fine after the first one. This just creates more scar tissue which could cause problems down the line.
    • Lauren Goehner
       
      For each procedure, he gives a blunt, one word response, and then elaborates briefly. By doing so, he conveys his own voice and opinion, while demonstrating medical knowledge without the complex jargon and sounding too much like a doctor.The readers do not care to know more than what he says.
  • ...2 more annotations...
  • looks like Cruella De Vil
    • Lauren Goehner
       
      A funny, and easy-to-imagine comparison.
  • Heidi had a very nice derriere before the surgery. She should leave well-enough alone. She risks it becoming lumpy and uneven.
    • Lauren Goehner
       
      Instead of saying butt, he chooses to say "derriere", which sounds more sarcastic. Again, he uses brief sentences and informal language ("lumpy" and "uneven"), enhancing the conversational feel. You can almost hear him standing, counting out each surgery on his fingers, and giving his respective opinion.
Scott Prentice

Celebrities: Our Walking Ads - 3 views

  • So browsing the past brought up a lot of "she did whats?!" that would make the avid gossipists look away with shame for my naivety. 
    • Lauren Goehner
       
      This sentence sounds as if it is part of the author's diary - this whole introductory paragraph reads almost as a diary entry, giving the readers a special insight into the author's thoughts. The descriptive language in this particular sentence evokes a very clear image, as I can almost see a group of gossiping women behind their trashy magazines, with a look of shock on their face.
  • watching the girls sitting in front of you in class surf perezhilton.com
    • Lauren Goehner
       
      So true.
    • Chelsea Hamill
       
      She is relatable. We have all been in a boring lecture thinking it will never end. Some people daydream and some check Perez. I have to admit I am one of those girls.
  • and you know what? I kinda like it.
    • Lauren Goehner
       
      This is a good example of the author's voice, and the realtionship she is cultivating with her readers. By saying, "you know what?", it's as if she is telling us a secret, which in a way she is.
    • Chelsea Hamill
       
      Ok's causal and conservational writing it flows making it easier to read. I also agree with Lauren, Ok "you know what?" does make the reader feel like OK is letting you in on something.
  • ...7 more annotations...
  • Anne is playing mom here, cleaning up the mess that celebrities and their big mouths leave behind
    • Lauren Goehner
       
      This is a good comparison, and a strong way to characterize the blogger.
  • n't this what we're thinking anyway?  Seriously, wtf??  So Anne, thanks for pointing out the obvious because it needs to be done!  And also because it's fun to read
  • "she did whats?!" that would make the avid gossipists look away with shame at my naivety. 
  • , we realize that there are already ten people in your close vicinity with the same thing on.
    • Scott Prentice
       
      this is a funny/interesting observation
  • So, my recommendation to you, take The Superficial pill once in awhile, to prevent an overdose in gossip that will make you feel self conscious, or leave you wishing you lived a different life
    • Scott Prentice
       
      Maybe a few commas can be taken out in this sentence.
  • Real quick, I have to plug my own blog before you become aficionados of The Superficial and forget all about me: come here for a dose of celebrity lives from a different angle
    • Scott Prentice
       
      Good transition to close your post
  • Anne is like you and me: so called normal people.  I'm pretty sure she doesn't have a slew of paparazzi
    • Scott Prentice
       
      Good way to differentiate her from the other super popular bloggers, but doesn't every popular blogger end up getting nearly the attention as the celebs they gossip on once they build their fan base? Just a thought.
Nicole Tam

Voice X - The Money Diet - 1 views

  • Granted, nobody's going to make a reality TV series based on my diet experiences. I did have a comical moment when I went to the gym the first week, climbed aboard one of those StairMaster-like contraptions and almost fell off. Maybe there would be some melodramatic footage if someone filmed me every time I went through a McDonald's drive-thru to buy my kids the occasional Happy Meal or ice cream. I'm sure that I look like a tragic romantic figure every time I pass by the posters and pictures of McDonald's Angus burger.
    • Nicole Tam
       
      This is a nice way to add some realism in a funny way. He is proud of the weight he has lost, while realizing that it isn't quite dramatic enough to start a reality show about. This experience at the gym is something a lot of people have probably dealt with. This tangent about his un-dramatic weight loss leads into an interesting scenario between him and McDonalds.
  • -Angus, I only met you several months before I began this diet. Angus, I hardly knew ye. -"Dad, would you stop kissing the menu?" -Angus, call me-- -"Dad!"
    • Nicole Tam
       
      Geoff has personified the angus burger and has not only started dialogue with it but has started a relationship with the burger. This shows that food is more than just food to Geoff, and now that it has been taken away from him it is equivalent to losing a lover.
  • OK, maybe that's not exactly how our visits to the drive-thru have worked out. As I was saying, mostly this is a drama-free diet.
    • Nicole Tam
       
      This snaps him back into reality. He is conversational with the readers and he is honest with them. Although he was initially skeptical about how this diet would work out, he is now realizing that although he isn't dropping tons and tons of weight, he isn't experiencing much drama. This offers hope to readers, and he is giving it to them in a way that isn't overly motivational. Some people become annoyed always hearing that they can do it, and that it'll be easy. This is motivation that seems to be coming from a friend. He is letting you know that he is trying it, and so far it isn't so bad.
  • ...5 more annotations...
  • I had several chances to destroy my new, healthier eating lifestyle, but somehow, I stuck to my plan.
    • Nicole Tam
       
      This is a funny, and more negative way of saying that he has stuck to his diet. He is clearly still doubting himself and waiting for the day that he caves, but he is also pleasantly surprised that he has still been able to diet. Rather than just saying he ate healthy this week, or he resisted temptation, he refers to fast food and junk food as chances to destroy his new lifestyle.
  • I bought cupcakes for my daughter's kindergarten class to celebrate her birthday, and I didn't swipe any for myself (we had extra and don't think I wasn't tempted).
    • Nicole Tam
       
      This is almost like giving himself a pat on the back. The parenthesis are an aside to the reader, letting them know that although he didn't actually eat the cupcake, he was still tempted and is still human and wrestling with his diet.
  • I also lost money by not going to the YMCA -- we have a membership, and I should be using it more -- but I didn't make it once this week. If I had, I might have finally dropped enough to get into the high 240s.
    • Nicole Tam
       
      The dashes are a way for Geoff to take a moment to explain why not using the YMCA gym lost money for him. This is him reflecting on what he could have done better, and realizing that it would have helped him lose weight and make the most of the money he is spending.
  • I used to spend almost $100 a month on snacks and generally unnecessary food -- and frankly, I'd rather not believe that.
    • Nicole Tam
       
      The dash again is similar to the use of parenthesis. It is a bit of an aside to the reader. It isn't necessary to understand what he is saying, but it lets you know his feelings about what he is realizing, and the mental pause that people take when they see a dash adds to the voice created when he adds his opinion about what he has just realized.
  • he slightly less heavyset Geoff Williams
    • Nicole Tam
       
      I thought this was a cute and funny way to sign off on the blog post. It gives more character to the author, and also shows that the diet is working.
  •  
    money diet week 4 progress
1 - 20 of 35 Next ›
Showing 20 items per page