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Angela Moneck

Public Writing Assignment #1 - 80 views

Update: I just posted my comment onto YouTube now that it let me sign up. I did have to shorten what I originally wrote because of the character limit. Here is the link again: http://www.youtube.c...

pwa1

Meghan Winn

Aveda - Official Site - Watch Aveda videos in the Aveda Video Player. - 0 views

    • Meghan Winn
       
      This webpage has a video presentation called "About Aveda" that uses logos as its source of rhetoric. The video talks about how Aveda cares for our environment and how pure their product is. They call upon our reason and logic by telling you how clean and safe their production methods are. Some examples are when they talk about their use of green energy for production (100% wind energy) and how all of their packaging uses recycled materials.
Angela Moneck

YouTube - Sarah McLachlan Animal Cruelty Video - 0 views

    • Angela Moneck
       
      This video is an example of pathos because it evokes many emotions from the person watching the video. Every time I see this commercial on T.V., it makes me feel so bad for the animals and want to go adopt one right away. It evokes a feeling of sadness along with guilt in order to persuade the viewer to possibly go adopt and save the animals. This type of persuasion can be very effective. At least they're making us feel bad for a good cause!
Garrett Granger

YouTube - Food Saver - 0 views

    • Garrett Granger
       
      This video clip is an advertisement for a vacuum packaging product called the Food Saver. The video provides a good example of the logos form of rhetoric. The woman in the video provides multiple reasons for why the viewer should purchase the Food Saver. She explains that the product can prolong the life of foods, reseal opened food bags, be used to store eating utensils, and most importantly, save the buyer money. Even though the viewer has most likely never seen the woman in the advertisement, they are captured by her claims and the evidence that supports it.
Garrett Granger

YouTube - A Favour House Atlantic - Coheed & Cambria - The Last Supper - 0 views

    • Garrett Granger
       
      This video is a clip from the band Coheed & Cambria's live DVD entitled The Last Supper. I believe the video clip serves as a good example of ethos. In the video, you can clearly see that the band has the full attention crowd, and they appear to approve of the band's performance. Because Coheed & Cambria was the headlining act at this show, it's likely that the majority of the crowd was there specifically to see Coheed & Cambria. Had there been another band on stage, it's possible the reaction from the crowd may have been entirely different.
Garrett Granger

YouTube - Go Vegetarian! - 0 views

    • Garrett Granger
       
      Here's another video clip displaying a form of rhetoric. This time, the video appeals to the pathos form. Even though the clip has no spoken audio, the message is very clear. The creator of the video decided to use an approach that makes the viewer feel a sense of guilt. The somber sounding string ensemble playing over footage of chickens, cows, and pigs is enough to make anybody think twice before biting into their next cheeseburger. This form of rhetoric may be he most effective of the three varieties, because of its ability to make a deep-rooted connection with the viewer through their emotions.
Charlotte Randolph

Sunny Side of truth - 0 views

    • Charlotte Randolph
       
      All of the videos that the Truth Campaign uses are Pathos driven beacuse they rely on your emotions to convince you that cigarettes are bad for you. The advertisement "Tough Love" relies on people thinking "wow, there is a lot of bad chemicals in cigarettes." This campaign is really effective at using Pathos, because their ads really get you thinking about how the big companies care nothing about the little people.
Ryan Meehan

"Trendspotting" by Demetri Martin on The Daily Show - 0 views

  •  
    Watch the following segment from The Daily Show called "Trendspotting."
Ryan Meehan

"Rabbit" by Run Wrake - 0 views

  •  
    A thought-provoking animation by illustrator and cartoonist Run Wrake. What argument is the creator of the film trying to make? Is it clear? Is it successful?
Ryan Meehan

"Trendspotting" by Demetri Martin on The Daily Show | Diigo - 0 views

  • Rhetoric is important in the advertising industry, and in a way, I’m kind of selling my page to other people.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Great response, Angela. I appreciate your wiliingness to be so thorough here. Let me ask you, though. You make a good point that maintaining and updating a social networking profile page is a way in which you can "sell your page," and that you employ similar tactics to ad agencies trying to sell products. My question would be: What do you suppose your product is? In other words, why are you focused on driving more traffic to your page?
  • You need body language, eye contact, touch, sound, inflection!
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Great point. In what ways do you think we account for the lack of "traditional" rhetorical tools we have available to us in the online format?
  • who by the way has other funny stand up videos on You Tube, you should check them out
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Your instructor agrees.
  • ...3 more annotations...
  • The Daily Show sometimes takes the rhetoric of pathos to the extreme and ruins the validity of their argument all together.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      I think this is an interesting point that might be worth exploring a bit more in-depth at some point in the semester. Does The Daily Show get a "free pass" due to its status as a comedy show? What are some undoubtedly valid arguments it has presented over the years, and what are some examples of arguments that maybe get lost in the slapstick?
  • I think that my page truly represents who I am
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      This comment reminds me of a discussion I have had with previous classes about the rhetoric of clothing and body decorations (tatoos, piercings, etc) Many students would often say something to the effect of "My clothes help me express who I am as a person." I sometimes think of Facebook the same way - it's like the clothes we wear on the Internet.
  • (Prostitot- preteen/young teen girls who dressing in a slutty-esque fashion.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Brilliant!
Alex Gutierrez

Mathews Inc - Bows and Archery Accessories - 0 views

shared by Alex Gutierrez on 13 Sep 08 - Cached
  •  
    this is a good video I believe illustrates a good example of pathos
Meghan Winn

Natassia Watson - 0 views

shared by Meghan Winn on 07 Nov 08 - Cached
  • in seeing
    • Meghan Winn
       
      this should be 'to see'
  • “the War
    • Meghan Winn
       
      'The' should be capitlized
  • to for
    • Meghan Winn
       
      'to' should not be there
  • ...24 more annotations...
  • and so
    • Meghan Winn
       
      i think it would flow better if you took these words out and just started with 'throughout' as a new sentence
  • McCain,
    • Meghan Winn
       
      comma should be before McCain not after
  • McCain’s underlying purpose
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Why do you call it underlying? I feel like that is kind of the whole point of his speech.
  • Speech
    • Meghan Winn
       
      doesn't need to be capitalized
  • With that said he goes on to explain the mounting cost of presence not just in dollars but the amount of live that have been lost since the start of the war.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      This sentence is confusing.. it might be cleaer to say 'With that said he goes on to explain the mounting cost of our presnence in Iraq, not just in dollars, but in the amount of lives that have been lost since the start of this war.'
  • therefore our
    • Meghan Winn
       
      doesn't make sense
  • and so
    • Meghan Winn
       
      I think it would flow better if you took these words out and started another sentence with 'He'
  • statement
    • Meghan Winn
       
      should be plural
  • we continuing without and
    • Meghan Winn
       
      might make more sense saying 'our continuing without an'
  • but the also
    • Meghan Winn
       
      doesn't make sense
  • used ethics
    • Meghan Winn
       
      earlier you said he didn't directly discuss an ethical issues
  • Videos
    • Meghan Winn
       
      why is this here?
  • numerous and respected
    • Meghan Winn
       
      i don't think you need the word 'and' here
  • , such
    • Meghan Winn
       
      it would flow better if 'such' started a new sentence
  • uses logos to justify his position on the war, he constantly made
    • Meghan Winn
       
      you changed tense from 'uses' to 'made'
  • officials also
    • Meghan Winn
       
      should be 'officials who also'
  • whom republicans
    • Meghan Winn
       
      i think it should be 'whom are republicans'
  • that don’t support the war. 
    • Meghan Winn
       
      this makes the sentence a little wordy and is not needed since you already said they 'share his view of a misguided war'. it is kind of repeating yourself
  • but lack pathos
    • Meghan Winn
       
      doesn't make sense
  • Such statements combined with other rhetoric effects do make this a somewhat appealing argument. 
    • Meghan Winn
       
      this sentence contradicts the rest of the paragraph
  • McCain would result
    • Meghan Winn
       
      might make more sense to say 'is what would result'
  • “& intolerable violence. 
    • Meghan Winn
       
      no end to this quotation
  • Obama was more successful in the visual portion due to logical transition and development of his ideas.  Obama’s use of the rhetorical techniques was more forceful and poignant, he spoke with more fervor and greater deal of certainty in his position and thus was able to deliver a better argument.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      you kind of discuss new thoughts here.. you might want to add another paragraph after it that ties into your main idea more and closes the paper
    • Meghan Winn
       
      You used lots of quotes throughout your paper but never cited where they came from.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      You had very good details and awesome word choice! You also used the correct point of view throughout the paper and did a good job staying on topic.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Your opening is good but i'm not sure if the last paragraph is meant to be a closing since it discusses new topics. You might want to add another paragraph or make that one relate more to the rest of the paper.
Michael Gutierrez

Alex Gutierrez - 0 views

shared by Michael Gutierrez on 06 Nov 08 - Cached
  • (Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary).
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      Try using a shorter defenition.
  • I will discuss ethical decision making, analyzing and observing the usage of ethos, pathos and logos throughout the presidential election process.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      Dont tell the reader exactly what you are going to do. Give the reader a feel for what you are going to do.
  • Campaign ads, televised debates and speeches have all been organized specifically to communicate and persuade the American people.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      watch sentence structure
  • ...11 more annotations...
  • In a recent video interview, Jim Wallis an evangelical Christian writer and political activist discusses religious issues that Americans will be faced with
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      sentence structure
  • purposing
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      proposing
  • and success in politics
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      give some examples
  • heady the appeal of a call to arms, however just the cause, we should still shed a tear for all that is lost when war claims its wages from us”.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      I dont think I would use a qoute that is this big. It allmost takes up the entire paragraph
  • has learned
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      has had
  • purposed
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      proposed
  • his platform
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      Describe his platform better. Many people will not know what it is.
  • A major issue concerning the next president will be the war in Iraq
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      Try to tye your paragraphs together better.
  • McCain uses logos
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      How does he use Logos?
  • Sometimes they work out, other times they have ended with inconceivable tragic consequences
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      This appears to be a fragment
  • You be the judge
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      good conclusion. I think this paper is good in that it has many good ideas. The one thing I would look at is the flow of the paper. Keep a look out for how you word your sentences.
Janice Perez Rivera

Brian Russo - 0 views

  • The moderator or administrator of the website uses a great amount of Pathos in order to really appeal to the hearts of his readers, because you have to be a pretty cold person to not feel bad at all for an animal who closes its’ eyes and cries moments before it is murdered, time and time again.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This is a good example of pathos. It even made me feel bad for the animals.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I think you should cut off your introduction before you go onto describing the pathos. Otherwise, it's a realy good introduction. You introducted your topic and your opinion well.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Actually, I think you could just take out the pathos part and put it somewhere else in the essay, and continue the introduction.
  • provides lots
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I think you should use the word "a lot" or "many" instead of "lots."
  • ...12 more annotations...
  • the reader can truly feel the pain of that animal.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I think this is an logical absolute. You're assuming something about the audience that may or may not be true.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Assignment Parameters- I could see your main idea throughout the entire paper. You definitely stayed on topic and made very good points.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Style-Point of view is appropriate. You stated your opinion throughout the paper, which is okay in this type of paper. Your word choice is appropriate.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Conventions-I didn't notice any grammar or spelling errors. You do need a Works Cited Page though.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I didn't see if you really talked about any involvement you had in the website, so maybe you should add that in towards the end.
  • I believe that they should include some of the videos that are currently posted on YouTube of the actual killings.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      This is a very good point. this would be a great way of showing and building up people's emotions on what is occuring to these animals
  • The thinking capacity for the average dolphin is amazing, because they are highly intelligent.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      maybe here you should add some stats on how intelligent dolphins are.
  • Warning: this meant contains mercury and puts you at risk for serious health problems
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      Don't forget to put direct quotations if yoour using a direct quote "Warning.........."
  • into the lunches of school students!
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      wow... I never knew .... that. That is crazy!!
  • to try
  • meat to try to raise
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      should be and try to raise the public's...etc.
  • especially when the meat from the kills is contaminated
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      tr to make this flow a little better.
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