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Meghan Winn

ENC 1102 Project III - 0 views

shared by Meghan Winn on 26 Nov 08 - No Cached
    • Meghan Winn
       
      So far the paper isn't bad at all. It is very informational and well written. You use a lot of good details and everything is clear and understandable.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      In the paragraphs you have written you mainly just give details about Africa. When you continue writing I would make sure you address the topic more and tell of the websites visual rhetoric and your involvement in thier webpage. You should also try to critique their page and maybe give some ideas of your own.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      Like Meghan said so far what you have is not that bad at all. I think the paper flows together very well and you have more than enough details in the first 2 paragraphs. I am assuming that there is going to be more written so be sure to address the visual rhetoric of the website that you viewed.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      Again just make sure to include what you did and how you interacted with the website. anything that they did that caught your interest or anything that you did in regards with involvement on the website.
Amanda Flores

Gatorade® - 0 views

    • Amanda Flores
       
      This Gatorade website is an example of ethos because it gives back up to support the product. This site gives its readers the satisfation that if Tiger Woods, a well known athlete, drinks this drink, it has to be good.
Dena Rennie

Project 2 rough draft - 0 views

shared by Dena Rennie on 06 Nov 08 - Cached
  • Works Cited
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Good job with the Works Cited and annotated bibliography.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      My floating sticky notes aren't working again, so here is my conventions critique: Conventions- The only thing I noticed was a small amount of spelling errors and that the in text MLA citations are missing. Otherwise, good job. Especially on the works cited and annotated bibliography.
    • Dena Rennie
       
      Make sure if you use MLA works cited, that you use MLA paper sourcing as well. And usually you need an extra space between sources in MLA works cited, it also makes it a lot easier to read the sources.
  • different
    • Angela Moneck
       
      You've used the work "different' four times in two sentences. You could substitute this word with another word to make it more interesting.
  • He also,
    • Angela Moneck
       
      A comma is not needed there.
  • ...12 more annotations...
  • throught he
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Speling error.
  • Also, he appeals to the veryday people with comments like that on his website that say, “I’m asking you to believe, not just in my ability to bring about real change in Washington… I’m asking you to believe in yours.”
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Good quote.
    • Dena Rennie
       
      everyday is missing an e
  • Also, there is John McCain who has been around the presidential election process before. He has ran for President before and did not make it past primary elections. He was a part of the U.S. House of Represenatives for Arizona in 1982, and was elected to the U.S. Senate in 1986. He is someone who has been around the hustle and bustle of the Washington lifestyle. He is someone who, it would be thought, would be ready for the highest position in our country. His platform has included helping out our economy and ensuring our national security. He wants to get health care costs down to a price that is reasonable for all people. One thing that McCain differs from Obama on is the issue of Iraq. McCain believes we need to assist Iraq in becoming a prosperous country on its own, before we can back out and leave them alone.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I like how you introduced each candidate. It makes the paper flow much better.
  • McCain’s written rhetoric can be seen on his website where he describes how he plans to change our country. His main ideas and what he stands for are clear to see there. It says “Country First: Reform, Prosperity, Peace.”
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This paragraph is very short. It's a good point, but I think you can go into it further. You could do this by possibly giving another example.
    • Dena Rennie
       
      This paragraph's length makes it one of the weaker points of the essay. It starts off with a good transition, but there is no evidence to support that what he stands for on issues.
  • Each candidate uses rhetoric to appeal to their potential voters. They both use Pathos to appeal to their audiences. They appeal to the middle class by promising a change in the way they have lived their lives, by lowering taxes and getting more affordable healthcare. Obama appeals to the minorities saying that it is their time to take a stand and get out and vote, telling them that they can make a difference. Ethos is a big part of politics, because if we have no confidence in what they have stood for in the past how can we back them now. A person’s reputation is key in politics, especially in the Presidential election. This is the time when scandals become forefront, because each party is trying to discredit the other. If we aren’t confident in the person how can we be confident in the policies. Logos is used, although I’m not sure always effectively. Politicians use logic to appeal to people saying how things in our country are now and how they believe they can change them in the future. For instance, logically if we are in a state of economic crisis we want someone who plans to change that for the better.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I see where you're going with this paragraph, but I'm not sure if it's effective. I think that you need to explain individually in the paragraphs exactly what is an example of pathos, what is an example of ethos, and so on. Otherwise, I think it would be hard for people, especially people who don't completely understand rhetoric, to be able to figure out what is an example of which one.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Organization-Your organization was good and clear. With the exception of the conclusion, I wouldn't change anything.
    • Dena Rennie
       
      Your organization between candidates is good, but I would probably discuss the rhetoric each candidate uses within the paragraphs in which you discuss the candidates. It would help the paper flow a little better and possibly help improve your transitions between candidates even stronger.
    • Dena Rennie
       
      And I agree with Angela, you should most definitely have evidence to backup what rhetoric method each uses. Also there are very little references in this paper to sources, which you definitely need to make sure you use. This is a really good paper and I would hate to see you lose points due to possible plagarism. Even when you paraphrase you need to cite your source.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Assignment parameters- I thnk your main idea is conveyed effectively. I feel that your purpose is clear and easy to understand.
  • adamentaly
    • Dena Rennie
       
      I could be wrong but I think this is misspelled.
  • different
    • Dena Rennie
       
      Try finding another word besides different, it has popped up quite a few times within the first paragraph, and it's a little overload. Usually you don't want to use a specific word more than two times within a paragraph (three if it's a very large paragraph, definitely no more than that)
  • Election
    • Dena Rennie
       
      Election doesn't need to be capitalized
  • There has been much debate about the candidates for this year’s election.
    • Dena Rennie
       
      This first sentence seems a little awkwardly worded.
  • bama’s Written rhetoric is clear in
    • Dena Rennie
       
      1) Written doesn't need to be capitlized. 2) This paragraph seems like it stops short. It feels there should be more depth to it. One example is easily to manipulate into saying that "well that's just a one time thing, he did this some other time." The more examples you have, the stronger your argument will be. =)
  • McCain uses visual rhetoric in his speeches and debates as well. H
    • Dena Rennie
       
      Same thing applies here as the paragraph above. The more examples you have, the stronger your argument. Make sure you have reputable sources as well.
Janice Perez Rivera

Brian Russo - 0 views

  • The moderator or administrator of the website uses a great amount of Pathos in order to really appeal to the hearts of his readers, because you have to be a pretty cold person to not feel bad at all for an animal who closes its’ eyes and cries moments before it is murdered, time and time again.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This is a good example of pathos. It even made me feel bad for the animals.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I think you should cut off your introduction before you go onto describing the pathos. Otherwise, it's a realy good introduction. You introducted your topic and your opinion well.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Actually, I think you could just take out the pathos part and put it somewhere else in the essay, and continue the introduction.
  • provides lots
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I think you should use the word "a lot" or "many" instead of "lots."
  • ...12 more annotations...
  • the reader can truly feel the pain of that animal.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I think this is an logical absolute. You're assuming something about the audience that may or may not be true.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Assignment Parameters- I could see your main idea throughout the entire paper. You definitely stayed on topic and made very good points.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Style-Point of view is appropriate. You stated your opinion throughout the paper, which is okay in this type of paper. Your word choice is appropriate.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Conventions-I didn't notice any grammar or spelling errors. You do need a Works Cited Page though.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I didn't see if you really talked about any involvement you had in the website, so maybe you should add that in towards the end.
  • I believe that they should include some of the videos that are currently posted on YouTube of the actual killings.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      This is a very good point. this would be a great way of showing and building up people's emotions on what is occuring to these animals
  • The thinking capacity for the average dolphin is amazing, because they are highly intelligent.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      maybe here you should add some stats on how intelligent dolphins are.
  • Warning: this meant contains mercury and puts you at risk for serious health problems
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      Don't forget to put direct quotations if yoour using a direct quote "Warning.........."
  • into the lunches of school students!
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      wow... I never knew .... that. That is crazy!!
  • to try
  • meat to try to raise
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      should be and try to raise the public's...etc.
  • especially when the meat from the kills is contaminated
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      tr to make this flow a little better.
Cybil Scott

Why guys go for outta-their-league ladies - Behavior- msnbc.com - 0 views

  • Men, no matter how unattractive, think they’ve got a chance with a runway model
    • Cybil Scott
       
      This website is an example of pathos. It invokes a feeling within the reader. It is designed to make women laugh and to make men feel worse about themselves. Which are both obvious emotions. In my opinion, there are no examples of ethos involved for the reputation of the author or of the person or subject being talked about. There are no examples of ethos except to say that "studies have been done". There is also usage of biased words, such as "plump patron" to create more humor and emotion.
Amanda Flores

Feel Better at TYLENOL®.com - 0 views

    • Amanda Flores
       
      This Tylenol wedsite is an example of logos because it gives information and details about all it's different products. When searching for the different products it gives all the facts and information on that certain product itself.
Meghan Winn

Comp II Project I - Google Docs - 0 views

shared by Meghan Winn on 15 Oct 08 - No Cached
  • Ursala
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Correctly spelled Ursula K. LeGuin
  • Ursala K. Le Guin
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Correctly spelled Ursula K. LeGuin
  • Ursala’s portrayal of a typical anti hero shows the many truths about life in how an isolated child such as this main character is able to portray.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Organization- Sentence doesn't make total sense
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Sentense doesn't make sense.
  • ...47 more annotations...
  • Ursala
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Incorrect spelling
  • The people within this city are aware of these conditions and even though known as joyous people ignore the fact of this child and are compliant of the situation.
  • Childs
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- wrongly capitalized
  • accordance
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- order would make more sense here
  • Many cases torture can be used for greater of mankind,
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentense doesn't make sense
  • Many cases torture can be used for greater of mankind,
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention-sentence doesn't make sense
  • is clearly not what our government sees as a means of reliance for torture
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentence doesn't make sense
  • and or
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- and/or
  • Many times these instances with the small child although not acceptable in today’s society could potentially happen for mere fact of having a better life for others.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- commas are needed around "although not acceptable in today's society"
  • is revealing of torture
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doesn't make sense
  • Levin’s
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- should just be Levin
  • and making
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- should be "and of making a choice"
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention-Levin
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • to join his side of the instances
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentence doesn't make sense
  • along with one even stating she would want to watch.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- This is wrong. The mother said she would want to administer the torture not just watch.
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Levins
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • for the better of human kind.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doens't make sense
  • These instances are shown very well, and also persuade the reader that may not be for these circumstances to begin seeing Levins point of view and begin to reasoning with him.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- parts of sentence don't make sense, wrong tense used for reason
  • McCullagh gives examples of how our government will when needed perform acts of torture with no knowledge
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- commas needed around "when needed", need to specify who has no knowledge
  • Many times in our history presidents have had to make tough decisions on this topic and decide to go against all odds such as Lincoln suspending the Habeas Corpus act in 1861.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentence changes tense
  • and considered Lincolns
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- should be "and is considered Lincoln's"
  • Although this instance is proclaimed it is also beatable by the U.S. Constitution stating that
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentence doesn't make sense
  • it becomes the more ethical thing to achieve from the success of saving many more lives with the sacrifice of one.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doesn't make sense
  • Foner claims “We must accept limitations on our liberties” meaning we should accept the presidents decisions on terrorism and the effects that the president decides to secretly take on these actions.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- This is wrong. Foner is just citing "sentiments that are likely to be with us for some time to come." The article is actually about how he thinks "the most patriotic act of all is the unyielding defense of civil liberties."
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- commas are also needed around the quote
  • by bringing people right of speech
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doesn't make sense
  • “Wired” and “The Nation” in the articles discussed tend to have a similar style of writing
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- the authors have a similar style of writing not the magazine
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Articles by both Foner and McCullagh indicate how our government must take drastic matters into their own hands and deal with them in ways that the American public should not be aware of. These measures are important to our society and many times save thousands of lives. It seems as if in our society we are okay with these measures as long as the public does not hear of them. This ideal image of both Foner and McCullagh are imperative in the success in our American society today.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- This is wrong. As I stated earlier Foner completely disagrees with these actions and McCullagh never even says that he agress with the actions taken by our government.
  • Ultimately when reading these articles it comes clear that ethical basis comes into effect.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doesn't make sense
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Organization- The closing doesn't really relate to the rest of the paper. Ethics is only mentioned one time before this.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Organization- There is no opening to the paper. You go right into discussing your first article instead of introducing your main idea.
  • Ursala
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Ursula
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Levin’s
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Assignment Parameters- The paper does not really reflect the idea that was assigned. There is only one reference to rhetorical basis and style (pathos, logos, or ethos). You didn't always state whether the author was for or against torture. You also didn't really mention anything about the credentials or authority of any authors or sources so there was nothing about how this affects the success of the message. You also did not research any additional articles on torture so there was obviously no discussion about their specific claims or how they use situation and fact.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Organization- There are a lot of good details used in the paragraphs about LeGuin's story but many of the things talked about do not relate to the topic. The first two paragraphs are good discussion on the story but don't relate to the subject of torture and there is no mention about how this author uses rhetorical strategies.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      You use a lot of good details and quotes throughout the paper but the fact that you have incorrect references and have the whole idea of Foner's article wrong might make your paper look unreliable.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      The paper doesn't tie together very well. For one of the authors you talked about rhetoric, for one you talked about different aspects of the plot and for some you gave too much review of the information in the article and not enough about the message they were trying to portray and the writing style they used to get it across to the readers.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      The paragraphs about Levin are good. You use details that help develop your ideas and also state what kind of rhetoric style he uses to persuade his readers.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      The paragraphs about McCullagh have too much review and not enough of your ideas on his writing style, message or credentials.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      The paragraph about Foner's article is really confusing to me. Not only are your references not accurate with his article but I don't understand that sentence about how he claims "his views on terrorism by bringing people right of speech"?
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Your bibliography page is also supposed to be in MLA format, not just the link to the website.
Michael Gutierrez

The World Wildlife Foundation... - 0 views

  • they way they live
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      regarding the way
  • By not saving animals the human race is hurting itself. Once people figure out they are all here for each other is when things will really start to change.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      I completely agree. That is awsome that you are all about conservation. I feel alot of the same thats cool.
  • It about being responsible for my actions.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      100% true
  • ...9 more annotations...
  • If I can’t kill it I shouldn’t eat it, so I’ve taken a stance on not eating beef or pork.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      Dont really understand this here, maybe elaborate a little more here.
  • The World Wildlife Foundation is
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      I think this paragraph should be a bit stronger. The opening paragraph is very important. You really need to give a good idea about what the paper is going to be about.
  • I grew to love and respect nature
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      I was brought up to love and respect nature
  • advocated
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      advocate
  • and because I love the study of life so much.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      This sentence sounds a little akward. Just watch sentence structure
  • However, the simple action of even discussing this paper
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      This is a good sentence
  • and information the site
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      information on the site
  • Clicking on the “Good Stuff” tab lead me to a place where WWF merchandise is sold.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      Where you describe the website is very good and very important.
  • trustworthy site for a great cause, and I felt a little bit better about the world after I joined.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      like your opening paragraph, your conclusion needs to be much stronger. It actually should relate back to the opening paragraph.
Angel Aramayo

Angela Moneck - 0 views

  • news-just
    • Garrett Granger
       
      Maybe use a comma here.
  • issues coming
    • Garrett Granger
       
      ...issues, and come together...
  • their opinions out there
    • Garrett Granger
       
      Maybe reword this. Something like, "to express their opinions."
  • ...5 more annotations...
  • The online community I chose to analyze is called Care 2 (Make a Difference). This community fights for several different causes including human rights, the environment, health care, animal welfare, and education.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      I'm not sure the first sentence is totally necessary. Maybe you could incorporate the name of the online community in the beginning of the second sentence.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      yes i agree that the name of what you are supporting should standout and be in the beginning of your paper.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      I don't think the word "that" is necessary, and can be eliminated in most cases.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      Be sure to add parenthetical documentation after quotes.
  • I signed a petition called “Stop segregating with colors.”
    • Garrett Granger
       
      Try not to start consecutive sentences with the same words.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      As garrett said starting the sentence with the same beginning words makes it seem repetitive.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      I think the paper is pretty good. a few minor mistakes that you find in every first draft. I think the flow of the paper is pretty good. a few repetitive statements but other than that i think it is pretty good. also i would start incoporating or introducing your topic or your website a little earlier in the paper, like the first or second paragraphs.
Meghan Winn

Hours upon hours of searching... - 0 views

shared by Meghan Winn on 25 Nov 08 - No Cached
  • provided
  • Their dedicated team took over the extremely valuable work provided by Schwab Learning, another non-profit that was the pre-curser to GreatSchools from of January of 2008 and all the information once provided by the Schwab Learn will be incorporated into the GreatSchools website.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      this sentence is very confusing
  • provided
    • Meghan Winn
       
      change of tense (providing)
  • ...30 more annotations...
  • provides parents, guardians, and concerned citizens a voice
    • Meghan Winn
       
      i think you mean it provides them a place to voice their issues
  • in a form of a forum.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      'in the form of a forum' might make more sense
  • would have proven
    • Meghan Winn
       
      'could' might be more appropriate since the site is still there and still has users
  • which by being ignorant is a social injustice in itself.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      kind of makes the sentence confusing
  • you understand your
    • Meghan Winn
       
      avoid the words 'you' and 'your'.. remember the point of view writing tip that we were supposed to read a few weeks ago!
    • Meghan Winn
  • difficulty whether
    • Meghan Winn
       
      if there supposed to be a connecting word here?
  • But it is very impossible to do it
    • Meghan Winn
       
      confusing.. what is 'it'?
  • student
    • Meghan Winn
       
      should be plural
  • who are more knowledgable with knowing how
    • Meghan Winn
       
      'with knowing' should be replaced with a word like 'about'
  • Actually, not only one, several replies back actually.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      you don't need to say actually twice
  • in spreading out knowledge with dealing certain situations.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      doesn't make sense
  • responded to
    • Meghan Winn
       
      you should add something like 'with the idea' between these two words
  • incorporate the schoolwork to basketball
    • Meghan Winn
       
      kind of confusing.. might make more sense to say 'relates the schoolwork to basketball' or 'incorporates their schoolwork and basketball'
  • The fact of the matter is that by using certain sites one can fight the right fight if one can believe in it.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      sentence is not very clear
  • picture has
    • Meghan Winn
       
      'shows' might make more sense than 'has'
  • in depicting in
    • Meghan Winn
       
      confusing
  • you, the parent or guardian, the chance to be this teacher with your child. Though recall that it doesn't mean that it requires you to peer over your child's shoulder, it requires you to help your child in any manner possible because in the end of your child's life, the biggest teacher was you.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      refer back to what I said about avoiding you and your earlier.. you use them a lot in these sentences
  • to make
    • Meghan Winn
       
      'use' could sound better
  • matter that can through
    • Meghan Winn
       
      not very clear
  • what you
    • Meghan Winn
       
      POV- avoid 'you'
  • in search for help
    • Meghan Winn
       
      'in search of help' might make more sense
  • In the future, I hope this site gets more and more popular as the years progress.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      you don't need to say both 'in the future' and 'as the years progress'.. they kind of mean the same thing
  • finding
    • Meghan Winn
       
      change of tense
  • get the education they deserve
    • Meghan Winn
       
      this is not needed and makes your sentence sound very repetitive
  • future ,
    • Meghan Winn
       
      no space needed
  • behind in life for the rest of their lives.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      word choice makes this sound confusing
  • If being an activist becomes a problem then it is no longer activism.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      what does this mean?
  • persuading
    • Meghan Winn
       
      change of tense
  • It is as simple as that.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      repetitive.. you just used this sentence
    • Meghan Winn
       
      You use some very good details and have some good ideas for improving this webpage.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      You had some confusing sentences but I'm sure if you fixed those your paper would be much more clear and easy to read.
Janice Perez Rivera

Sean McMillan - 0 views

  • he just feels that he doesn’t have the right personality to run the United States.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      That last sentence does not flow as well as it should.I think it's the word run "personality to run the United States" Maybe you should try,...he just feels that he doesn't have the correct personality to lead this country. or you can use the United States.
  • George bush
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      Make sure you capitalize Bush
  • When addressing and issue or speaking to the audience,
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      Instead of using and use an issue.
  • ...2 more annotations...
  • This theme was a great example of ethos, where he connected to people’s emotions with something they deal with everyday and love dearly, the family.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      This is a very valid point on how he connected with the middle class. Just a suggestion another way that Obama connected with the middle class and getting them to feel connected to him in someway were they feel like he completely understands them was by advertisement through the internet... not just his websites but through facebook and myspace. That is how he reach to college students. Also the radio.
  • He a great example of someone
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      He is a great example of someone verses He a great....
Brandon Cruz

Discussion: Your rhetorical life - 53 views

I think the past couple of months have been the most rhetorical months of my entire life, if you will. With the presidential elections in full swing I found myself right in the middle of the action...

Angela Moneck

Public Writing Assignment #1 - 80 views

Update: I just posted my comment onto YouTube now that it let me sign up. I did have to shorten what I originally wrote because of the character limit. Here is the link again: http://www.youtube.c...

pwa1

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