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Meghan Winn

ACT Fluoride Rinse > The #1 Dentist Recommended Brand - 0 views

    • Meghan Winn
       
      I believe that this webpage uses ethos as its primary source of rhetoric. The company refers to its own character by telling you that it is the "Number one dentist recommended brand." They also tell you that three out of four dentists recommend it to their patients for cavity prevention. I chose this page because they (ACT) continually boast about their own reputation.
Meghan Winn

Comp II Project I - Google Docs - 0 views

shared by Meghan Winn on 15 Oct 08 - No Cached
  • Ursala
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Correctly spelled Ursula K. LeGuin
  • Ursala K. Le Guin
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Correctly spelled Ursula K. LeGuin
  • Ursala’s portrayal of a typical anti hero shows the many truths about life in how an isolated child such as this main character is able to portray.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Organization- Sentence doesn't make total sense
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Sentense doesn't make sense.
  • ...47 more annotations...
  • Ursala
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Incorrect spelling
  • The people within this city are aware of these conditions and even though known as joyous people ignore the fact of this child and are compliant of the situation.
  • Childs
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- wrongly capitalized
  • accordance
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- order would make more sense here
  • Many cases torture can be used for greater of mankind,
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentense doesn't make sense
  • Many cases torture can be used for greater of mankind,
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention-sentence doesn't make sense
  • is clearly not what our government sees as a means of reliance for torture
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentence doesn't make sense
  • and or
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- and/or
  • Many times these instances with the small child although not acceptable in today’s society could potentially happen for mere fact of having a better life for others.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- commas are needed around "although not acceptable in today's society"
  • is revealing of torture
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doesn't make sense
  • Levin’s
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- should just be Levin
  • and making
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- should be "and of making a choice"
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention-Levin
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • to join his side of the instances
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentence doesn't make sense
  • along with one even stating she would want to watch.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- This is wrong. The mother said she would want to administer the torture not just watch.
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Levins
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • for the better of human kind.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doens't make sense
  • These instances are shown very well, and also persuade the reader that may not be for these circumstances to begin seeing Levins point of view and begin to reasoning with him.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- parts of sentence don't make sense, wrong tense used for reason
  • McCullagh gives examples of how our government will when needed perform acts of torture with no knowledge
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- commas needed around "when needed", need to specify who has no knowledge
  • Many times in our history presidents have had to make tough decisions on this topic and decide to go against all odds such as Lincoln suspending the Habeas Corpus act in 1861.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentence changes tense
  • and considered Lincolns
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- should be "and is considered Lincoln's"
  • Although this instance is proclaimed it is also beatable by the U.S. Constitution stating that
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- sentence doesn't make sense
  • it becomes the more ethical thing to achieve from the success of saving many more lives with the sacrifice of one.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doesn't make sense
  • Foner claims “We must accept limitations on our liberties” meaning we should accept the presidents decisions on terrorism and the effects that the president decides to secretly take on these actions.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- This is wrong. Foner is just citing "sentiments that are likely to be with us for some time to come." The article is actually about how he thinks "the most patriotic act of all is the unyielding defense of civil liberties."
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- commas are also needed around the quote
  • by bringing people right of speech
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doesn't make sense
  • “Wired” and “The Nation” in the articles discussed tend to have a similar style of writing
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- the authors have a similar style of writing not the magazine
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Articles by both Foner and McCullagh indicate how our government must take drastic matters into their own hands and deal with them in ways that the American public should not be aware of. These measures are important to our society and many times save thousands of lives. It seems as if in our society we are okay with these measures as long as the public does not hear of them. This ideal image of both Foner and McCullagh are imperative in the success in our American society today.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- This is wrong. As I stated earlier Foner completely disagrees with these actions and McCullagh never even says that he agress with the actions taken by our government.
  • Ultimately when reading these articles it comes clear that ethical basis comes into effect.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- doesn't make sense
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Organization- The closing doesn't really relate to the rest of the paper. Ethics is only mentioned one time before this.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Organization- There is no opening to the paper. You go right into discussing your first article instead of introducing your main idea.
  • Ursala
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Ursula
  • Levins
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
  • Levin’s
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Convention- Levin
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Assignment Parameters- The paper does not really reflect the idea that was assigned. There is only one reference to rhetorical basis and style (pathos, logos, or ethos). You didn't always state whether the author was for or against torture. You also didn't really mention anything about the credentials or authority of any authors or sources so there was nothing about how this affects the success of the message. You also did not research any additional articles on torture so there was obviously no discussion about their specific claims or how they use situation and fact.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Organization- There are a lot of good details used in the paragraphs about LeGuin's story but many of the things talked about do not relate to the topic. The first two paragraphs are good discussion on the story but don't relate to the subject of torture and there is no mention about how this author uses rhetorical strategies.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      You use a lot of good details and quotes throughout the paper but the fact that you have incorrect references and have the whole idea of Foner's article wrong might make your paper look unreliable.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      The paper doesn't tie together very well. For one of the authors you talked about rhetoric, for one you talked about different aspects of the plot and for some you gave too much review of the information in the article and not enough about the message they were trying to portray and the writing style they used to get it across to the readers.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      The paragraphs about Levin are good. You use details that help develop your ideas and also state what kind of rhetoric style he uses to persuade his readers.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      The paragraphs about McCullagh have too much review and not enough of your ideas on his writing style, message or credentials.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      The paragraph about Foner's article is really confusing to me. Not only are your references not accurate with his article but I don't understand that sentence about how he claims "his views on terrorism by bringing people right of speech"?
    • Meghan Winn
       
      Your bibliography page is also supposed to be in MLA format, not just the link to the website.
Ryan Meehan

Defining Rhetoric | Diigo - 0 views

  • Rhetoric can be used through visual, oral or written language.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Rhetoric permeates almost every aspect of our lives. Can you imagine a time in which you are not acting rhetorically?
  • Plato said that rhetoric is the "art of enchanting the soul." Rhetoric is defined as "study of the technique and rules for using language effectively to please or persuade."
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      That Plato's quite a character. I'm not sure if rhetoric "enhances the soul," but it is certainly a means through which one can enhance an argument. Next week, we will explore a few popular common rhetorical appeals that will help us identify and name different types of rhetoric.
  • A person would not use colossal locutions from their extensive vernacular when speaking to a group of five-year-olds.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Haha. Well said.
  • ...4 more annotations...
  • Rhetoric is basically used by people to make sure that they convey their message in a way that the audience is able to grasp the concept of what the speaker is trying to get across.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Right, which means that having a keen awareness of the audience to whom you are writing or speaking is of paramount importance. The concept of "audience" will be an important one this semester. I will often ask you to cater your writings to their intended audiences. And the reality is, even though you may not think about it, in most cases you do this automatically. For instance, in this discussion forum, you are probably writing in a style that you feel is appropriate for an audience of mostly freshmen college students.
  • The company usually isn't just saying "Our product is better than theirs" but, rather they use discreet methods to lure our minds into believing that the viewer can not live without this product and that they need to get it right away.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Advertising is LOADED with rhetoric, and it's usually not all that subtle. Have you ever seen an Axe bodywash commercial? How about Cialis? In politics, generally rhetoric can be a bit more tricky. Fortunately, we're in prime season for political rhetoric and we will have a project that focuses on how the candidates each approach "being rhetorical."
  • Rhetoric is the use of style and form to pursuade or simply inform the reader of certain arguments or ideas. Rhetoric uses the literary techniques logos, ethos and pathos to appeal to a variety of readers and viewpoints. Logos is the logical appeal, pathos is the emotional appeal, and ethos is the appeal to the writers or anyones credibility. Using these techniques rhetoric is a powerful and useful way to argue a viewpoint or present and idea.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Two thumbs-up for being concise AND covering a lot of ground. Also, good work digging up a good academic resource from RPI. I have used that exact source before in previous classes and may very well use it again this semester.
  • or convincing my parents that I need a new car for my birthday.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      This is crucial, and I am pleased that you raised this point. We are ALWAYS acting rhetorically, even when we aren't writing college papers or giving oral presentations.
Angela Moneck

Rhetorical analysis - 0 views

  • "Why Liberty Suffers in Wartime".
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I noticed that you put puncuations outside the quotation marks in some parts of your paper, but I'm pretty sure they're supposed to go on the inside of the quotation marks.
  • He used the references to past mistakes very well but relied on them too heavily.
  • connect
  • ...14 more annotations...
  • connect
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This should be "connected," not "connect."
  • where he said "All of us today share a feeling of grief and outrage over the events of September 11 and a desire that those responsible for mass murder be brought to justice. But at times of crisis the most patriotic act of all is the unyielding defense of civil liberties, the right to dissent and equality before the law for all Americans"(foner).
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I believe that there should be a comma in between the word "said" and "All" before your quote. Also, Foner's name at the end of the quote should be capitalized.
  • One thing Foner could have improved on, like many of the other writers discussed, is his use of other professionals.  When a writer uses ideas, theories, or quotes from other field experts it makes the reader feel that he really did his homework and successfully researched and studied the topic, it almost acts as a security blanket reassuring the reader.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I think this is a very good point. It seems like you really took a lot of time to analyze the works. Good job!
  • It felt as is
    • Angela Moneck
       
      The word "is" should be "if."
  • Rhetoric is one of the most important part
  • Further proving that it's not always what you say, but how you say it.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I like the way this was said. It's very true!
  • Rhetoric, simply put, is the ability to effectively use language.  Rhetoric relies on three basic appeals to capture an audience: logos, ethos, and pathos.  Logos, or the logical appeal, bolsters an argument by supplying data, facts, or any method of logic.  Ethos, the appeal to ones emotions, connects the reader by using personal experience or "tugging heartstrings".  The last appeal, pathos, is the appeal of the publishers and writers credibility.  This being said, the four writers, LeGuin, Levin, McCullagh and Foner show how diverse rhetoric is and how a writer can manipulate any of these three appeals to gain and inform an audience.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I like your introduction. It's good that you explained what rhetoric was and how it's used because when writing pubilcly, all readers may not know exactly what you're talking about.
  • tackles
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I like that you used the word "tackles" instead of some other not-so-exciting verbs.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Conventions-I didn't mean to pick on your grammer and puncuation, but that was all I could really pick on! The rest of your paper, I thought, was very good. Most of the stuff I could critique involved small grammatical errors, (which everyone makes), especially on papers.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Oh, also, in the Conventions area, your references were correct. You used the correct format and used in-text citations, so there is definitely no plagiarism is present.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Assignment Parameters-I thought you did a VERY good job with keeping on topic. You explained everything that you needed to explain to the reader including if the author's credentials effected their work, what rhetoric they used, etc. It was easy to understand exactly what you were saying.
  • She also refers to the child as "it" helping us to understand how the child as viewed, as an "it" rather than a "whom".
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This is a very good analysis.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Style-You chose good words to use, making the paper not boring. You switched some of the verbs and descriptions you used, which is very important, especially in a long paper. Your sentences varied with construction, which is also a good thing. You kept your opinion out of the paper and kept the point of view as being non-biased.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Overall I thought your paper was very good. I can tell you really took time to analyze the works, figure out what the author was attempting to say, and answer all the questions that were assigned.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      It won't let me highlight another section that was already highlighted, but I really liked that you used "tugging heartstrings" to describe the use of pathos.
Garrett Granger

YouTube - A Favour House Atlantic - Coheed & Cambria - The Last Supper - 0 views

    • Garrett Granger
       
      This video is a clip from the band Coheed & Cambria's live DVD entitled The Last Supper. I believe the video clip serves as a good example of ethos. In the video, you can clearly see that the band has the full attention crowd, and they appear to approve of the band's performance. Because Coheed & Cambria was the headlining act at this show, it's likely that the majority of the crowd was there specifically to see Coheed & Cambria. Had there been another band on stage, it's possible the reaction from the crowd may have been entirely different.
Ryan Meehan

myliblog: Uncle Bobby's Wedding - 0 views

  • Thank you for working with my assistant to allow me to fit your concerns about “Uncle Bobby's Wedding,” by Sarah S. Brannen, into our “reconsideration” process.
    • Ashlee Duckworth
       
      Opening with this comment welcomes the reader and makes me feel as if the author has truly considered the issue at hand.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I agree with Ashlee's statement. This is a warm welcoming to the reader.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      With this opening statement, the author gives the response a more personal feel. It also allows him to give a truthful answer without coming off as offensive.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      Yes i also agree with the comments above, this is one of the very opening statements and it brings about a more personel level with the reader.
    • Brian Russo
       
      I agree as well with the comments above. This opening statement makes the reader feel welcome and ensures them that they are doing the best they can at reviewing policies and dealing with the issues at hand.
    • Brian Russo
       
      I agree with everyone. The opening statement makes the concerned parent feel welcome and that they are trying to deal with the situation as best they can.
    • Amanda Flores
       
      I like how he opens this by thanking her. It is very welcoming, like everyone has said.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Great comment.
  • Here's what I understand to be your concern, based on your writings.
    • Ashlee Duckworth
       
      This comment gives me the impression that the author wants to make sure that what he thinks the issues is, actually is what the problem is. This shows caring and intelligence.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Again, I think Ashlee made a very good point with this. This is important in solving an issue.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      I like the way he wrote this because he is letting her know what vibe he got from her writings. By him stating this there can be no confusion. All that she can say would be that he took it the wrong way. or that's not what she ment, if so from there on there could be more clarification if needed.
    • Dena Rennie
       
      It is very effective how he took direct quotes from the patron, so it is clear that he does not twist her words. It shows he does not want his point of view to be misconstrued.
    • Brian Russo
       
      I like the way that the writer is looking to clarify exactly what the issue at hand is so there is no confusion.
    • Amanda Flores
       
      He did good in putting this in here. He is letting her know what he feels she is concered with to see if it matches what the actual concers are. Like Ashlee said, it shows that he cares.
    • Ashlee Duckworth
       
      This paragraph makes me feel as if the author actually understands multiple viewpoints.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      I agree that this paragraph shows his understanding of many different views on the subject. I think citing these is effective because it lets the patron see the other views also.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      I also think it is a good way for the author to either show or express that he is not just set on one point but actually multiple viewpoints.
  • ...36 more annotations...
  • Your second issue is a little trickier. You say that the book is inappropriate, and I infer that your reason is the topic itself: gay marriage.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      I like how the author responded to this concern by citing examples from other childrens books and also giving logical reasons why these issues are addressed in childrens books.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      In this sentence we see that the defender has a clear understanding about what the argument is
  • Your third point, about the founders' vision of America, is something that has been a matter of keen interest to me most of my adult life.
    • Meghan Winn
       
      The author makes a good arguement here and supports his point very well. The fact that he wrote a book on the subject makes you believe that he knows alot about the topic and that his views about preserving our individual liberties are correct.
    • Cybil Scott
       
      Basically saying "I know more, if not as much as you do. So I'm probably right." Haha
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      Yes i agree with Cybil, he basically just said that he knows his stuff in this subject matter.
  • which has reviewed and adopted these policies on behalf of our library
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This small statement is a way of persuading the reader. Without this piece of information, the reader may not trust the Board of Trustees or care about them.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      I agree, this statement provides an understanding of the authority of the Board of Trustees.
    • Brian Russo
       
      This statement shows the reader that they will make an informed decision and not a biased one.
  • Children's books deal with anything and everything. There are children's books about death (even suicide), adult alcoholism, family violence, and more.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      After stating that children's books deal with many different things, she went on to provide examples. This is important in persuading the reader to believe what she is saying.
    • Brian Russo
       
      I like the way Mr. Larue stated that children's books can deal with anything and everything, even things that may be inappropriate because it is relevant to the situation that those books are allowed at the library.
    • Brian Russo
       
      By showing that other children's books deal with issues about anything and everything it shows that all childrens books aren't always happy.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      I dont think that this paragraph is defended well at all. I am absolutely not convinced in this paragraph. Just because there are many disturbing childrens books does not make them right.
  • Even the most common fairy tales have their grim side: the father and stepmother of Hansel and Gretel, facing hunger and poverty, take the children into the woods, and abandon them to die!
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Again, she's providing specific examples--very effective. I thought it was interesting that she used an exclamation point instead of a simple period to end this statement. I think the point of it is to persuade the reader even more to listen to her. It's kind of like saying "hey, listen to this statement, it's important, and I'm completely right!"
    • Cybil Scott
       
      I love the part about the children's stories, it's so true! A great reminder to the reader to help get their point across.
    • Amanda Flores
       
      I agree with Angela. By stating these examples, he is more likely to persuade.
  • Stories help children name their fears, understand them, work out strategies for dealing with life.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This is important in persuading the reader. She is going on further to prove her point.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Whoops, I mean he!
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      Yes i agree, this was a good way to further persuade the reader.
    • Ryan Meehan
       
      Nice comment!
  • So what defines a children's book is the treatment, not the topic.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This is good that they explained what actually defines the children's book since earlier on in the piece they said that the topic wasn't what defined it.
  • In fact, I even wrote a book about it
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Ethos! He wrote a book on the topic, making the reader think that he knows what he's talking about and that he is trustworthy.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      Wow! I bet that response was a bit of a sock. I would hate to strike an argument with someone who was a professional on the subject, especially if I didn't know they were beforehand.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      The Author shows much credibility on the subject, with this sentence.
  • My Webster's actually gives several definitions of marriage: “1. the state of being married; relation between husband and wife...; 2. the act of marrying, wedding; 3. the rite or form used in marrying; 4. any close or intimate union.” Definitions 2-4, even as far back as 1960, could be stretched to include a wedding between two men. Word definitions change; legal rights change. In some parts of America, at least today, gay marriage is legal.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This is definitely a great way to persuade the reader. He's throwing out facts from the dictionary to prove his point. And the fact that he states that definitions and legal rights change is very true. Also, stating that gay marriage is legal in some parts of the country is great. I think he did a really good job in this particular paragraph.
    • Dena Rennie
       
      I think the first definition sort of weakened his argument about gay marriage, seeing as how the first definition says "relation between husband and wife." I would have also added an updated version of Webster's definition of marriage to see if the wording has changed. He goes on to say that word definitions change, but just because you have a 1960s definition of "dog," and say that word definitions change, does not mean that that specific word's meaning will be the one that changes.
    • Amanda Flores
       
      I feel that definitions from the dictionary are a great way to prove yourself. He is telling her the facts, you can't argue with that. But I do agree with Dena. The first definition does weaken his argument.
    • Brian Russo
       
      The fact that he states that gay marriage is legal in some parts of the country, is a good point in explaining to the reader that if something is legal, they can't say that writing a book about it is inappropriate.
  • But if the library is doing its job, there are lots of books in our collection that people won't agree with; there are certainly many that I object to. Library collections don't imply endorsement; they imply access to the many different ideas of our culture, which is precisely our purpose in public life.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This is a very good point also.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      He brings up a good point by explaining that not everyone shares the same opinions and a good bit of the material present will recieve mixed feelings.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      I think it also helps that he earlier showed that he was opened to multiple views not just his own.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      Great point. The purpose of a library is to educate people. Many people go to the library for a general knowledge of many different topics. If someone personally wants to censor what they or there children read, that should be a personal decision.
    • Amanda Flores
       
      I agree with all of them, this is a great point.
    • Brian Russo
       
      He brings up a good point that he objects to certain books, but it doesn't mean that other people and cultures don't enjoy them. I also like the fact that he states that the library doesn't endorse any of the books people may deem innapropriate but they are there for people who want them.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      I think that this a good point. There are many things that are disagreeable and should be disagreeable
  • I do appreciate many things: your obvious value of reading, your frank and loving relationship with your child, your willingness to raise issues of importance to you in the public square, and more. Thank you, very much, for taking the time to raise your concerns with me.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      He is being very respectful about the whole issue.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      You do not find that to often.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      Jamie does a good job explaining his decision, while still being respectful of the womans views. I personally think this shows a reflection of his character.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      this was good very persuasive.. ( it's like the old saying " kill people with kindness) she cannot get mad at the way he ended this.
    • Dena Rennie
       
      That was very reputable of Jamie to respond to the fact that the woman does care about her family and this is why she raised the issue. It shows how respectful of others he is.
    • Brian Russo
       
      I like the way he ended this on a positive note even though he didn't give the decision that the patron wanted.
    • Amanda Flores
       
      I really like how he said this. It shows that he is very respectful. I also agree with Alex, this does show the a reflection of his character.
  • I even hauled out my favorite Webster's
    • Garrett Granger
       
      I like how the author even looks into the sources provided by the individual filing the complaint. This shows that he has truly looked over the claims and is taking the issue seriously.
    • Angel Aramayo
       
      Yes, i agree with Garrett on this one. I like how the author looked over the source to let it be known that the author know's what he is talking about.
  • Little Red Riding Hood (in the original version, anyhow) was eaten by the wolf along with granny.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      The usage of specific examples to show that not all children's stories have happy endings is very effective.
  • But another book in our collection, “Daddy's Roommate,” was requested by a mother whose husband left her, and their young son, for another man.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      This statement shows that while some may find certain things inappropriate, the same things may be hepful to others. And in this case, a similar book proved to be a helpful tool for a different mother.
    • Brian Russo
       
      This is a valid statement. Different personal circumstances allow for different interpretations of things. What may be helpful to one person, may be innapropriate to another.
  • has spent time thinking about the context in which the library operates, and thoughtfully considered the occasional discomfort (with our culture or constituents) that might result.
    • Cybil Scott
       
      Assures the reader that their feelings have been considered. Very persuasive.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      Here, we assume that the laws and regulations have been thought over and agreed upon by a credible authority. The last sentance in this paragraph is very important. When running a public service there is always going to be someone that is unhappy. Utilitarianism is important in making these decisions, "the greatest good for the greatest number".
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      I agree with Cybil here. As I start reading this article I become more and more convinced that the Board of Trustees are a credible source.
  • Although I suspect you may not agree with my decision, I hope it's clear that I've given it a great deal of thought, and believe it is in accordance with both our guiding principles, and those, incidentally, of the founders of our nation.
  • I have been assured that you have received and viewed our relevant policies: the Library Bill of Rights, the Freedom to Read, Free Access to Libraries for Minors, the Freedom to View, and our Reconsideration Policy
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      Jamie describes the rules and regulations of public libraries here. He is building his case with firm evidence that will help the woman understand his decision.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      I agree with you completely. By him bring up the rules states that he is bringing up facts. With facts behind the decision that he is making the lady can't really say that he is wrong she can only have a opinion since he has a fact.
    • Amanda Flores
       
      I agree with the both of you. You two said it all.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      This is very persuasive because the person defending the piece seems to be well educated. A good education is one of the most credibe factors concerning a person.
  • You directed me to the SarahBrannen.com site, which I also reviewed. I got a copy of “Uncle Bobby's Wedding” today, and read it.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      He shows that he is making his own decisions, and researching the topic. Jamie wants to understand why there is an issue and gain supportive evidence why he makes the decision that he does.
  • First, I think you're right that the purpose of the book is to show a central event, the wedding of two male characters, as no big thing. The emotional center of the story, of course, is Chloe's fear that she's losing a favorite uncle to another relationship. That fear, I think, is real enough to be an issue for a lot of young children.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      In making a constructive argument for a position, the sympathy of the woman is needed. Obviously she thinks strongly about her opinion, and swaying her mind is not going to be easy. Clarifying the situation in a non assertive manner is a step forward in making his case.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      In an argument it is extremely important to be able to understand the position of the other person. The Author does a great job portraying this in this paragraph.
  • His thesis is that both the purpose and power of children's literature is to help young people begin to make sense of the world.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      Making sense of the world is not an easy thing. Intorducing children to very real circumstances when they are young gives them an advantage in dealing with issues that will undoubtedly face them in their lifetime. I dont think it is how long someone can sugar coat that shapes personal opinions, but experience and informed decision making.
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      Once again I am absolutely not convinced by this. This is just one mans opinion. My opinion is that children's books are supposed to be entertaining. I dont think a five year old needs to understand the world.
  • They constitute a barrier to discovery and use. The books there – and some very fine ones -- just got lost. In the second case, I believe that every book in the children's area, particularly in the area where usually the parent is reading the book aloud, involves parental guidance.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      Censorship has long been banned and for good reason. Everyone wants freedom of speech for themself, but not necesarily for others. Parents are there to give guidence, and support. Not to censor their childrens lives and introduce them to a non-existent world.
    • Brian Russo
       
      I agree with Alex on that. Even though the books involve parental guidence, it isn't the parents job to formulate their opinions by themselves. I completely agree that people want everyone else censored, but at the same time want to be able to say whatever they want. It can't work both ways.
    • Brian Russo
       
      I agree with Alex, people want censorship, but only when its not them being censored. It can't work both ways.
  • In short, most of the books we have are designed not to interfere with parents' notions of how to raise their children, but to support them.
    • Alex Gutierrez
       
      Why else would children books be used. They are stories that most times use fantasy and fiction to teach a lesson.
    • Brian Russo
       
      It is a good point that not all parents are looking for the same thing. One parent may want to teach their kids to accept gay people and another may teach them that its wrong and to not accept them.
  • that that kind of decision is up to the parents, not the library. Because here's the truth of the matter: not every parent has the same value system.
  • First, you believe that “the book is specifically designed to normalize gay marriage and is targeted toward the 2-7 year old age group.” Your second key concern is that you “find it inappropriate that this type of literature is available to this age
  • First, you believe that “the book is specifically designed to normalize gay marriage and is targeted toward the 2-7 year old age group.” Your second key concern is that you “find it
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      This also portrays that the Author is credible. In this paragraph the author makes clear that he understands the womens arguments about the piece. By this paragraph the lady arguing against the piece can better understand what the author has to say.
  • In Little Red Riding Hood, they learn not to talk to big bad strangers. Of course, not all children's books deal with
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      This is much more convincing. There are examples where some disturbing children books can be good.
  • The book is published by G. P. Putnam's Sons, “a division of Penguin Young Readers Group.” Th
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      This is convincing. The women can look this up to see if it is a credible source.
  • You feel that a book about gay marriage is inappropriate
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      I defenitely agree that a book about homosexuality is innaproprite for a child.
  • government was based on the idea that the purpose of the state was to preserve individual liberties, not to dictate them. The
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      This is true. People should have rights. I dont think homosexuality is wrong. I do think it is wrong though when it is put into Children's books. I think this abnormal psyche could harm youth.
  • How then, can we claim that the founders would support the restriction of access to a book that really is just about an idea, to be accepted or rejected as you choose? What harm has this book
    • Michael Gutierrez
       
      How can a child make such a decision?
  • Recently, a library patron challenged (urged a reconsideration of the ownership or placement of) a book called "Uncle Bobby's Wedding.
  • ownership
  • I suspect the book will get a lot of challenges in 2008-2009. So I offer my response, purging the patron's name, for other librarians.
  • You suggested that the book could be “placed in an area designating the subject matter,” or “labeled for parental guidance” by stating that “some material may be inappropriate for young children.” I have two responses.
  • commented
  • myliblog
  •  
    "Recently, a library patron challenged (urged a reconsideration of the ownership or placement of) a book called "Uncle Bobby's Wedding." Honestly, I hadn't even heard of it until that complaint. But I did read the book, and responded to the patron, who challenged the item through email and requested that I respond online (not via snail-mail) about her concerns."
  •  
    Here Jamie is stating the facts that the lady stated which are extremely important because they are true.
  •  
    When Jamies states that Sara Brannen was trying to portray that gay marriage is normal.... Sara was not focusing on what was important which was the relationship between the uncle and the young person. i like the fact that he pointed that out.
Charlotte Randolph

Janice T. Perez Rivera - 0 views

  • In today’s society torture reminds me of “The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas,” by Ursala K. Le Guin. Because society paints a prefect picture.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This is the only time you mentioned any of the works we were assignened to read and analyze.
  • Bibliography
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This should be a Works Cited page by using MLA format.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      I don't think you understood the assignment completely. You wrote more about what torture is, where it is present, what practices are used, and what's considered torture. Our assignment said to analyze the four assigned readings and talk about how the author used rhetoric to state their opinion and whether it was successful or not. Then we had to choose academic sources of our own to analyze the rhetoric and how it portrayed the writer's point.
  • ...9 more annotations...
  • The definition of torture is "the act of inflicting excruciating pain, as punishment or revenge, as a means of getting a confession or information, or for sheer cruelty."
    • Angela Moneck
       
      You can use this when you revise your paper. You could briefly talk about what torture is, then go on to explain what rhetoric is.
  • If we keep on ignoring how people around us are hurting inside or if we keep on ignoring what is right in front of us (War on Terror) this cycle of torture is not going to get better.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      This seems like it's your opinion. The assignment says to try to keep our opinions separate from the paper.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Assignment Parameters-Your paper definitely maintains a main idea, but it is not the idea that the assignment was intended to create.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Style-Your sentence structure varies and I understand what points you are trying to get across, but once again, they are not the points that need to be made in this particular paper. Your point of view, for the most part, is appropriate because you are stating facts, but as far as your opinion, you need to try to keep your opinion out of the paper completely, even though that is sometimes very hard to do.
    • Angela Moneck
       
      Development-Your details do develop your main idea, but once again, your main idea wasn't what was assigned for this paper. The paper was mostly supposd to be about rhetoric and its effects on particular pieces of work. I can tell you took time to work on your paper, and if it followed the directions, I think it would be a pretty good paper, but as far as following directions, you did not. I would suggest you go back and look through the directions for the assignment again.
  • There is still torture involved with this however it is more mentally, than physically
    • Charlotte Randolph
       
      Look at the different types of torture. It is not mainly mental, there are a lot of physical types of torture, too.
  • Now how torture evolved into today’s society came from these past events and many more that were not discussed. However torture now is different than what it was ten years ago. Because of the laws and regulations that are set in place. Also because we don’t want history to repeat it self even though it has before. Now that our world is high tech and information can travel all over the world in a manner of seconds we are more aware if something tragic were to occur anywhere else. This helps from another genocide occurring. One of the questions that was always asked when I was learning about the Holocaust was where was the rest of the world when all of this was occurring?
    • Charlotte Randolph
       
      Look at the way these sentences are worded. A few of the don't make sense and they are choppy. Just try to reword these sentences and word them a little better.
    • Charlotte Randolph
       
      Pay attention to your grammer, copy it to a word document to spell check it before the final draft.
    • Charlotte Randolph
       
      Be srue to analyze the authors use of rhetoric in each article.
Amanda Flores

Oral rhetoric vs. Written rhe... - 0 views

shared by Amanda Flores on 06 Nov 08 - Cached
  • disagree with
    • Garrett Granger
       
      Maybe try using the word "oppose" here.
  • Some resources that support these claims are “Images in Words: Presidential Rhetoric, Charisma, and Greatness” by Cynthia G. Emrich, Holly H. Brower, Jack M. Feldman and Howard Garland,  “Survival of the Fittest: Rhetoric during the Course of an Election Campaign” by Jennifer Jerit, “Visual Rhetoric in Advertising: Text-Interpretive, Experimental, and Reader-Response Analyses” by Edward F. McQuarrie and David Glen Mick, “Support of Content and Rhetorical Processes of Writing: Effects on the Writing Process and the Written Product” by Kirsten R. Butcher and Walter Kintsch and, “The Rhetoric Institute: Notes and Comments” by Patricia Sullivan.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      I don't think it's necessary to list your sources here.
    • Amanda Flores
       
      When you are using these sources throughout your paper, you should state the person's creditablity. If not, what you are trying to back up won't be as effective.
  • these kinds of tactics are successful because “appeals that are high in emotional content will survive longer than other types of arguments.”
    • Garrett Granger
       
      This is a good example of backing your claims with factual information.
  • ...6 more annotations...
  • Jerit illuminates, “arguments that cause citizens to feel angry might inspire them to mobilize for or against a particular candidate.”
    • Garrett Granger
       
      Again, good usage of information from one of your source to support your claims.
  • Able minded Barrack Obama’s oral speech seems to be more successful than John McCain’s oral speech in their attempts to achieve persuasion.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      Maybe leave this closing statement at the end of the previous paragraph. It makes this one a little confusing.
  • “Presidents who engaged in more image-based rhetoric in their inaugural addresses were rated higher in charisma.”  They say, “Followers cannot act on messages they do not hear… people who are vivid, whether in appearance, manner or speech are more salient, and hence attract more attention than those who are not.”                                                                                   
    • Garrett Granger
       
      I think you are relying too much on quotes toward the end of the paragraph.
    • Amanda Flores
       
      Instead of using all the quotes, you could summarize. There are good points, just sum them up instead of quoting.
  • In his oral speech
    • Garrett Granger
       
      It gets a little confusing the way you go back and forth when comparing the different works by each candidate.
  • The use of ethos pathos and logos were used by Barack Obama and John McCain in written and oral speeches they gave.
    • Garrett Granger
       
      Be sure to seperate the paragraphs here.
  • written speech
Janice Perez Rivera

Angela Moneck - 0 views

  • It is the act of writing or speaking effectively. This “essential element of human action” includes many different forms
    • Charlotte Randolph
       
      These two sentences to me seem kind of choppy. They are complete sentences but I feel like they could be combined.
  • Ethos relies on the character of the speaker. Pathos evokes emotion from the audience and logos relies on logic or reason to prove a point.
    • Charlotte Randolph
       
      Try to combine these sentences too.
  • Although Biden does not agree with the war at this point, at the beginning, he greatly supported the invasion of Iraq. Since then, he has now become one of the “war’s toughest critics.”
    • Charlotte Randolph
       
      Wow I didn't know that he supported it in the beginning.
  • ...5 more annotations...
    • Charlotte Randolph
       
      You need to write more, it is supposed to be 1250 words minimum.
  • In the only 2008 vice presidential
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      take out the word only. it's extra .. In the 2008 vice presidential....
  • The war hits close to home with the vice presidential nominee. His son Beau is now in Iraq. He commented that he did not want his son going, but also does not want his grandchildren to have to go back later on
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      very interesting point. I did not know that the war for him was so close to home like you stated. i also did not know that he supported the war at first.
  • “How we leave [Iraq] makes a big difference.”
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      notice how he used the word "we" which makes the audience really connect with him. Because we includes everyone.
  •     Sarah Palin seems to feel more comfortable with oral rather than written communication. In her oral communication, it is obvious that she holds back nothing.
    • Janice Perez Rivera
       
      this is a very good and interesting point that you brought out
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