The first step would be to identify the undesired behavior you wish to change. The next steps are the trickiest and depends on many factors. This include developing a conscious and deliberate plan which includes 1) the ultimate goal, benchmarks (smaller more obtainable goals to reach the ultimate goal), 2) the steps to the first benchmark, 3) the rewards to reinforce desired reactions which approach the steps to the first benchmark, and 4) the criteria to use to mark progress. It may be helpful to work with a partner (someone else with the same phobia or undesired behavior) as a support person or a mentor (someone who has done it or has some counseling background). This is a very difficult strategy to accomplish alone. Reinforce the positive steps away from the undesired behavior and steps toward the desired behavior with the selected rewards. Monitor your progress. Change the size of the steps, the rewards, or the benchmarks if any do not seem to be working. You may hit plateaus or periods of backslides. Accept them as a temporary setback and identify potentials of self-sabotage, negative self-talks, or situations which should be avoided for the time being. Make a conscious decision to continue with your plan (or modification of it). This may be a life-long "work in progress" if you are trying to change a deep-rooted fear or a behavior which feeds an addiction. Again, this is very difficult to do alone. You may need to work with a partner, mentor, or counselor.

A closer look might provide insight into how this experience will assist in Rachel's development: Positive emotions are created from the established lap reading routine that generates an intimate closeness and feeling of security. Interactive social dialogues between Rachel and her mother build on prior knowledge and provide immediate feedback as they discuss each animal as the story progresses. The language they use to label, compare, explain, and classify creates a supportive context for structuring the processes of thinking and concept formation. Each of the domains of development—linguistic, cognitive, social, and emotional—is affected during Rachel's experience, and all play an important role in her development

As Rachel began to internalize the actions and language of her mother, she began to use these tools to guide and monitor her own processing behavior until she is now able to take over much of the responsibility for reading the book (Dorn, French, & Jones, 1998)

A framework for understanding the interrelated nature of the cognitive, social, emotional, linguistic, and literacy development of children; social interaction; and literature selection in grades K-4 is provided in the appendix. The purpose of the framework is to provide a general guide for teachers, parents, and other caregivers in the appropriate selection of books that takes into consideration the importance of child development.

self-efficacy is a person’s belief in his or her ability to succeed in a particular situation

four major sources of self-efficacy