Stephen Fry: What I Wish I Knew When I Was 18 - 142 views
started by Amy Burvall on 24 Aug 12
started by Amy Burvall on 24 Aug 12
started by Amy Burvall on 24 Aug 12
started by Amy Burvall on 24 Aug 12
2:25 Goals
3:05 "Work is more fun than fun"
4:37 Self-Absorbtion/ Egoism
5:52 The Blame Game
6:27 American Whiny TV
7:16 Real Heroism
7:43 Opportunity and Networking
8:21 Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone
9:45 The Benefits of Travel
9:45 The Book Game
10:29 Perspectives
11:03 Admiration
12:45 What Real Learning Looks Like
14:14 On Giving
15:25 Regret / Life Lessons
16:34 On Knowledge, Truth, and Metadata
17:22 On Empiricism and Inquiry
18:20 On Authority
20:18 Socratic Questioning and Ethics
20:35 "Never stop being a child who asks why"
21:15 Age of Consent
21:50 Citizen Journalism (democracy and technology)
23:00 Conspiracy Theories
23:31 Transparency and Privacy
24:30 On Being Different
25:53 Creative Tension - Belonging and Standing Alone
26:51 Youth Culture
27:41 Connected World
29:27 YouTube Trolls
30:45 on Anti-Apple Madness
31:14 What Counts the Most in Life
@Kai - push yourself to reflect with your own personal connections, rather than simply restating or summarizing (they will look for that on the essay)
@Juliun - Wish I had an answer for you - good questions
@Selah- I totally agreed with him on both points..we all get a tad self-obsessed and should put it in perspective...also, the "knowledge" that is distinct from academic or "book" knowledge is truly often the most memorable
Going along with the same theme of making decisions, I thought that 25:53 about belonging and standing alone was interesting. He said that people often have a tension between the desire to be unique and the desire to belong. Some times we want to be the leader and be innovative when other times we want to be included in a connected community with fellowship. Fry states that we want to "be a part of the tribe AND a part from the tribe." Now they sound very similar but are extremely different; is it possible to feel both ways at the same time? In what ways do we wish to stand out and in at the same point in time?
I found this section to be very intriguing, especially because we are getting to an age that we are getting our first jobs, working hard with sports, and considering what work we would like to do in the long run. I wish he would have gone deeper into this topic, and discussed how to find work that is more fun than fun, but this was sufficient enough.
Also at about 6:00 when he starts discussing Shakespeare, I found it very relevant when he pointed out that people had things ruined for them at school. Like in my current English class there is a person who claims our ninth grade teacher "ruined" poetry for him/her by making them do too much analysis.
Mr. Fry also talks about being different (26:00), saying that we all want to belong and feel loved, but we also want to be our own selves as individuals. This is a hard balance to find, because if we are too different, others will see us as strange, and we will feel alienated. However, if we act too much like everyone else, we will feel that we have lost our own individuality, because we have come to conform our identity to that of a group. This led me to think - What exactly is individuality, and what implications does it have? (Does being an individual help us, or hurt us?).
Overall, Mr. Fry does a great job in taking a standpoint on various issues. He makes his viewers think about their beliefs and how they look at themselves (eg: Am I too egotistical?).
1) "sharing the benefits of life is the benefit of life" (15:32) I think that this quote is extremely powerful because it has the ability to teach a lesson and also make you think. Personally, I think that being able to teach and tell other people things you have learned is one of the most beautiful things a person can do. Why would we go to school and learn a bunch of things to just sit at home and let it fuster in our brains when we can tell other people about the weird fact you learned in science or something you hated in math? The things we learn everyday are meant to be shared or else there is no point in learning them.
2) "power comes from open inquiry" (17:24) One his main points was the thought that we must all test things, and most importantly question things. He states that "authority comes from the validity of testing information" thus the most powerful people are people that have the ability to test and warp information and knowledge until they are truly satisfied with the results. Because, as we all know "Knowledge is Power."
Finally, something that has really stuck with me after this video was over was when Stephen said, "Never stop saying why". Deep down all of us have the short bursts and tendencies to want to ask a question, even if it is stupid or feels childish, but none the less, asking questions is so incredibly important (as Stephen suggests) and it is crucial to never loose that childish, five year old persona of thinking "why is the sky blue?"
8:21 "Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone" Once again, I totally agree with Fry as he says it is important to get out of your comfort zone and I can totally relate and see where he's coming from. As a Netflix owner myself, I love watching all of the movies that are in my "suggested for you" area; however, Fry brings up a great point: sure you're very likely to enjoy what's recommended for you, but only because it's similar to what you have watched before. I completely see where he's coming from when he tells people to try new things because you're actually learning from the new material (at least when it comes to movies) and also getting out of what is your personal norm (in regular circumstances.) It really does seem silly how humans in general, humans are creatures of habit, and "animals of the herd" always doing what other people are doing. How easy is it to go against what we've always known, and that's been engraved within us? When we break our normal routine, will the out of place habit become the new routine? how do you prevent that?
9:45 "The Benefits of Travel" I have traveled around the world and the amazing feeling of seeing new cultures never gets old. It really is important to get out and see the world so that you can get a better understanding in general. As Fry said, you can't even understand where you come from until you have actually traveled from where you've lived to have another area to compare where you were raised to. This is definitely true because I know that if someone has never traveled out of the United States before they may assume that every one has the same conversion system in the U.S. when in fact they don't, they have the metric system. It is the United States that has decided to do things differently, and that's fine, it's just important to be aware of these small different facts that you can become aware of...through internet or through travel. I know that traveling is also very important when it comes to picking up new languages simply because even though you may study a particular language during school in America, it doesn't mean you truly understand the language simply because you don't know the culture, and you don't know idiomatic phrases or customs. Traveling is definitely important.
Fry's whole video about what he wish he knew when he was 18 is going to help all of us, I think. I paid attention to the section I just wrote about the most, but I also gave a listen to all of the other topics as well. For example, the working one. I'm personally turning 18 this October and this allowed me to get a hold of someone older and their perspective.
I personally feel like a older soul with older ideas and therefore older methods. I love the methods of my 65 year old parents so goal setting is very successful for me personally. I think a key aspect is what kind of goals you are setting. Yes it is true if you set shallow goals or impossible goals, the method will not work like how Mr. Fry said it would not. But if your goals are one step at a time toward an end result of true happiest, goals will work for you.
(7:00) I love his, "nobody cares about you!" attitude. I think in this age of entitlement, too many people are looking for sympathy and finding excuses not to work hard. I think if more younger people thought the way he thought about this particular topic, there would be more production and progression in the world. We would have more solutions then problems as well. I strive to remember that "nobody cares about me" and i need to make a difference before i deserve a second glance.
- We always want something that is similar, but we must learn to choose something different and going with something that is completely different from our liking. I really thought it was interesting to listen to Stephen Fry talk about how travel can have such an influence on people and that when we go to different countries we can finally realize our own culture (the US) and we wont know America unless we've traveled outside. We get out of our comfort zone and travel to see different places. I think as we become young adults, it'll become vital for us to explore and learn about different cultures and experience what the world has to offer because we are always so curious and we want to be able to understand more and see what we can.
"Never stop being a child that asks if something is right" 20:38
- I thought this was really interesting because it seems that we are always interested in learning new things and as we begin applying and going to college, it makes me question whether or not I'm making the right decision about the major I'm going into and the colleges that I'll be applying to.
"Increasing our levels of openness" 23:25
- Stephen Fry talks about how we need to learn to be open to others or watch what we're doing around others. And as we continue and see how electronics have begun to make our lives more open but at the same time has allowed us to keep things hidden with our community and with ourselves. I agree with Stephen because it is true. Many of us have almost separate lives online and on social media sights. We want to change who we are to become someone different so that people can see something new. It really relates to TOK and the ways of knowing; where we get different perceptions and transform ourselves and our identity.
"On one hand we want to belong in the tribe, on the other hand we want to be an individual apart from the tribe" 25:50
- Stephen fry talks about individuality and how many of us want to join mainstream trends and want to fit into what the new style is. Though at the same time, we don't want to lose our identity in order to stay true to who we are. So we flaunt ourselves and out do everything. I think that Stephen Fry's goal was to share that many of us need to go and find who we are. We question so many things but yet we don't have answers to everything.
I really liked this section because I was talking about this with someone the other day. I noticed that a lot of people like to talk about themselves and how their life is so hard and then there are people who have really awful things going on such as a dying family member or an illness that they don't share or talk about with other people. I know a lot of people talk about petty little annoyances in their life and try to one up the other person on how bad their life is. Everyone does it and I catch myself doing it sometimes too. It has become a habit that our society has and we just need to be aware of what we are saying and stop. In our society we are bombarded with people and things telling us to live for ourselves and to make ourselves happy. We shouldn't purposefully make ourselves unhappy but we also shouldn't be selfish. There is a book/movie called Eat, Prey, Love that came out a couple years ago. My friend and I did not know what the movie was about and we went to the theater to see it. When we left the movie we both started to talk about how much we didn't like it. The thing that we didn't like about the movie is that this woman left her husband to go travel the world because she said she needed to find herself. I thought she was being incredibly selfish and making a big deal out of nothing. People do this all the time and I hear celebrities talk about it all the time. You may not be completely happy with what is going on in your life at the moment but things will change and times will get better. Trust in God to lead you where you need to go. Instead of giving up on the life you have focus on positive things, find a hobby but don't be like the girl from the movie and leave your husband to go find yourself. If you really need help with something tough talk to people you trust. However if you continue to make a big deal out of every little aliment and talk about every little thing that hurts then people are not going to listen when you really have a problem. We may not notice we do this because it is a habit. I do this sometimes to and I catch myself doing it and I stop and try to focus on positive things in my life and ask people how their lives are going. As a society we need to stop focusing on our selves and worry about other people and help them if they need help.
4:00 Stephen is totally right about the core of a person. Sometimes I need to remind myself that everyone is essentially the same, no matter how much of a front they put up. Why do people react differently to the same situation? What makes people hide who they really are (besides the obvious traumatic experiences)? Do you ever really know a person?
15:45 "Sharing the benefit of life is the benefit of life" This quote was really inspiring and true to everyone because no one wants to ask, they always want to give. I really liked this part because he touched the topic of wanting to yell his 'younger self' what he knows now which, I think, everyone would like to do because it's like a second chance. Personally, I would like to give rather then ask because it's an honorable thing to do.
Overall, Mr. Fry is an extraordinary speaker that made me think throughout the session and reflect on my own experiences :)
"And I would say this, and many people will scream in disbelief, but I would say that the worst thing you can do in life is set yourself goals"
This line absolutely, totally, flabbergasted me. I like to think that I am a hard worker and am diligent in what I do, and that by setting for myself steps to rise to success, I will eventually achieve greatness in life. In my mind, I visualize life in a step-wise fashion, and each step is something I have to reach for and then achieve through hard work (and maybe a dash of miracles.) For example, I envision my near future to be something like this: get into a great college. And even then, I have thought farther into the future about why I want to get into a great college, which is because I want a better chance at attaining good jobs. And why do I want to get a good job that I like and pays me good money? Because I want money, so that I can have a comfortable lifestyle. Not anything too fancy, just so I can own a house, a car, have pets, have food to eat, while not having to sit rocking in a corner waiting for day-to-day paychecks. In our society, this is ingrained in our culture: get into a good college, get a good job, earn stable income, then settle down and begin the cycle all over again. Life has always been perceived as a linear entity that has to be taken one step at a time, as long as you know what the next step is. So, this line struck me. I also disagree with him at one point, where he says that if you achieve your goal, then you ask yourself, "now what? I'm not happy." Except, what if I am? What if I'm happy that I have achieved something, and now I can look forward to achieving other things that wouldn't have been possible had I not achieved that first thing? Some people are driven by accomplishment because accomplishment gives them purpose in life. Perhaps measuring purpose against accomplishment isn't a healthy thing to do, but most people would be lost without this concept. We need guidelines in life, and we at least need to know the basic structure of "how to build a life in the 21st century" so that we can move on to pursue the things we love and yearn to do.
6:27 American Whiny TV:
"Oh! Shut up and stop whining. Grow up and get a life, and look around you to other people, and don't expect people to care…if life has any secret, it's abnegation of self, efface yourself, don't talk, just don't say."
This was actually very poignant. It was a wake-up call for me, because just today I ranted to many people about "needing" to get this project done, and "needing" to study for this test, and "needing" to finish my extended essay. Now that I think about it, most people probably don't care that I need to get these things done. I told them that because I needed an outlet for my stress, but that doesn't change the fact that they probably don't care; they have their own issues.
10:29 Perspectives:
"'What do they of England know, that only England know?' And what do you know about your own country, if your own country is the only country you know?"
Since I was 1, I have been traveling in and out of the country all my life. Constant visits to China and then visits between states after my parents' divorce, my perspective on life was forced a little bit wider than most (at least in my opinion.) It's really, really hard to describe to other people what life can be like somewhere else, because a lot of the people I know in Hawaii don't have ties with any ancestral lands, or maybe not even the mainland. To me, life in Hawaii is incredibly strange. It is completely different than life in NYC or Maryland, and definitely different than life in Shanghai. I don't know how life on one planet can be so different, but it is. In each place there is a unique culture and aura that can't be replicated or described to someone else who hasn't had that exposure. I feel grateful for the life I have in America, because going back to China so many times has led me to realize what my own life might have been like if my parents had decided to stay in China. I would be studying day and day out, and that does not suit my personality. I like to do fun things, travel to beautiful places, write literature for fun, goof off on the internet with friends for hours on end, etc. But, perhaps if I had never known what life in America was like, then my personality might've been different. Gasp! Even in NYC, the culture of teenage life is so stressful because it's all about competition and getting better grades than your friends. Thank god I'm in Hawaii for high school, because if I stayed in NYC, I would have gray hairs, permanent eye bags, and an incredibly skewed view of the world.
20:35 "Never stop being a child who asks why":
"Oh I see, this number of days is a life, take one away, now it's just a mass of chemicals. The police enter a room and there's a couple making love and if they had entered the day before, it would've been statuary rape, but because it was the day after the birthday, it wasn't. Now, it's such a peculiar way to order a society like that."
I thought this part was a good example of how structured our society is. Now, I'm not giving any opinion about any of the topics above. I just find it interesting, just as Stephen Fry does. Though this sounds preposterous when stated above in this manner, it wasn't a shock that society runs this way. Everything is about structure and confining people to restrictions for both their well-being, but can negatively affect them as well. Structure is definitely needed in life, even though sometimes there might be odd policies or laws that don't many logical sense, but they just have to be there to provide a sort of guideline for things to run on. Or else, there would be anarchy and endless debates. Someone has to draw the line somewhere, even if it doesn't make any sense. I'm not saying whether I agree or not with any of those topics, I just find that our modern society is very adamant about drawing lines and making rigid pillars to prevent society from destroying itself.
Another section I enjoyed was 8:18 when he talked about the importance of talking to people in random places throughout life. Bottom line-- you cannot make it on your own. You cannot live in a bubble all of your life and the one of the best was things to experience things is through other people. You can learn from them, build off their ideas, collaborate, and develop knew ideas/questions. Some of the wisest people I know learn new things every day by talking to random people. This section really made me want to start conversation.... I am good at talking to my friends, but have never done well with starting conversation with strangers. Now it seems almost unusual not to. Take a plane ride for instance? I have often gone 9 hours without learning much more from the person next to me than their name and place they are coming from. Everyone has learned something you havent, and it is incredibly importance to share thoughts, as Fry said "Sharing things is the benefit of life."
Regret and life lessons. They are extremely important. Whatever happens may cause suck, but in the end, almost everything will help us become a better person. We learn things and gain knowledge from our mistakes. Perhaps we can pass down that information to the next generation, and also help them as they go through the same attempts.
What Real Learning Looks Like.
I think what Stephen Fry said about learning and the real way to learn things is completely true. I think that you can learn a lot more from going out and experiencing something, or even hearing another person's experience of it than simply reading it in a book. As informational as books can be, nothing is ever the same as when you read it or actually do it. The best way to learn is to surround yourself with people who have personally experienced things, who can give you advice on topics that you can only gain from first hand experience. I think a lot of what we learn in books is ideally helpful, but in the real world is irrelevant
i agree with my man Stephen on this one. the people who are bitching and making a big deal about minor stuff are not the ones that we really care about or feel sorry for. we empathize with those who are almost embarrassed to talk about their problem because they dont want to be that person who always caomplains.
2:25 (Goal Setting)
In this portion he stated that he thinks goal setting doesn't get people anywhere, it either discourages them due to failure or leaves them unsatisfied once said goal has been achieved. I've been taught my whole life that goals are extremely useful, and I have to stick with that opinion. The whole point of goal setting is to strive to do more. So even if you fail initially, that shouldn't be discouraging. Goals are meant to be set beyond what you know you can achieve. And with the right attitude, time and efforts, anything is possible. However, when it comes to the after math of achieving your goals, I remained somewhat puzzled. What does come after? More goals? Disappointment? These questions were actually answered in his next topic of "work being more fun than fun". It's not about the end result, it's about how you feel doing the work you need to do to get there. But this to me supports my opinion that goals are necessary. If you don't aim high and set goals for yourself, then you have nothing to work for or to look forward to.
24:30 On Being Different
and
25:53 Creative Tension - Belonging and Standing Alone
I totally agree on this part. How everyone feels different, yet they feel obligated by the community to go forward with a certain path because everyone wants you to or everyone expects you too, even if it's not your interest or desires. Also when he says that everyone wants to be a part of the group yet everyone says they want to be away from the group at the same time, this is how I feel and I think many others feel like this too. I enjoy the fact he talks about how it is good to be different, but also be able to have fun and interact with the crowd, with the group. This is what I try to do in life, and it is a very good message to convey.
18:20
On Authority
When talking about authority, he made it seem that any form of authority was in a sense a form of persuasion and changing peoples original mind set to something that they want. I found this very interesting due to the fact i am at the age that he described to be more vulnerable to being persuaded by authority. As a teenager i haven't been to exposed to the world and its persuasive ways and how people will manipulate you to make the world "Better" in their eyes by conforming to whatever their ideal world is. On the other hand they don't even bother with people who are later on in their adult hood due to the fact that they have spent to much time on this earth and know way to much to be persuaded. As young teenager coming into society how do i know whether or not what i think is a persuaded version of what i would normally think due to societies mind twisting ways?
I thought what he said here was extremely interesting but I'm not sure if I agree with it fully or not. this day and age is built on the goals of individuals, businesses, governments etc. without goals how would we motivate ourselves? I view goals as a staircase. you can say"I want to be a billionaire" but without incremental goals how do you get there? and maybe that's the problem; people set their goals too high but still expect to somehow miraculously achieve them so when they don't/can't they unfairly label it as a failure. if we don't try to strain ourselves to accomplish nearly impossible goals then we won't beat ourselves up for not accomplishing them; knowing we tried our best to get as close to the ultimate goal as possible should be enough of a consolation. what he said about reaching a goal and then asking "now what?" does happen. but that's not where that thought process ends! if you're happy now that you have achieved that goal, well, good for you! you've achieved like the ultimate reward through hard work and perseverance. if however you are not happy now that you have reached this goal, there's nothing wrong with that.. you just have to re-rout to find what you're really looking for. I mean, you've still accomplished something, it just wasn't the right thing for you. so what? re-adjust, set a new goal and move forward. without motivation and goal setting we would be a dead end community. those whose goals revolve around money generally work hard in school to get those high paying jobs (exempt for steve jobs...); those whose goals revolve around family may work the less glamours jobs in life to put food on the table every night; those whose goals revolve around themselves may be an artist or musician, doing what they love to be happy or communicate a certain message.
I found his section on talking about oneself really interesting, and I've always kind of felt that way. It's intriguing to notice how you feel when a conversation is entirely centred around the other person and you just have to listen to them bitch and complain, but I love when I'm talking to someone and they're bringing something new to the plate. If I can get something out of the conversation and contribute to it as well, then I believe it was very worthwhile, but enough about me...
I believe Stephen Fry is somewhat right but also somewhat wrong on this section about learning solely from your friends because although it is important, it is not the be all and end all. Of course you learn a lot from your peers as you all reflect and chat about the day but the formal lectures and textbooks have their place also. If anyone has ever tried to take an online class for the first time they will realize that it is very different that learning from a teacher who is a master of the given subject. I tried to take an online class with a friend but it was extremely difficult to teach ourselves and we ended up having to go for help from the teachers. In a classroom environment I'm sure that the topics we were trying to learn would have come very fast and easily for us. The time where learning from your peers is after the formal lecture when you can all reflect and share opinions and ask each other about the things that you did not understand. Chances are that at least one of your friends will be able to explain it to you.
Both learning from your peers and learning from a professor are important so I both agree and disagree with Fry at the same time.
This got me thinking about my current occupation as a student and future occupations and what I want in one. Me being a student isn't 'more fun than fun', but it certainly isn't 'that minimum wage job' that allows me to just barely live off of credit and drown my problems in alcohol.
I was raised as a spoiled white kid - and I intend to stay a spoiled white child. A lot of people (including Mr. Fry) that I've talked to or heard say to just study something that you're generally interested in and 'money will come later'... but ,if you ask them to sincerely look you in the eyes and tell you that they go to work because it's fun, I doubt many adults would be able to. They go to work because it gives a paycheck, not because it is fun. It makes money. I want to be able to support my hobbies and to live a very comfortable life, just as I did as a child and as a now young adult. This, unfortunately, requires money.
This is a pretty crude and example, but I am going to sink financially if I just do what I want to do. Let's say I'm interested in Asian studies and Asian history. I'm fairly certain that some museum curator or tour guide for 'some museum' does not make anywhere near what an entry-level petroleum engineer makes. Money is the thing that fuels the machine.
personally i agree with him on this. mostly because i have personal issues with being happy. for me and im sure for many other people, if you cant reach your goals, or are disappointed that you cannot reach your goals you cant be truly happy. and as he goes on to getting a good job and being happy and having fun doing what you do, it really hits home because i absolutely love my job. and i shouldnt be unhappy because i cant reach my goals, i should be happy because i found something that makes me happy, something i can do for the rest of my life.
In many different people, they commit their lives to setting and completing goals because they think it will make them a better person, and to some degree it will. but your first priority should be making yourself happy, finding something to make you happy, then you can go on to make others happy and go on to "improving yourself" through goals. and of course im guilty of this, as are most people. seeing it happen can be kind of irritating, when i see someone so unhappy because they cant do what they want i say to myself "good god you need to think about what makes you happy and continue doing what makes you happy before you go on to anything else" but i always find myself doing something for someone else, something that makes them happy but makes me miserable. so its definitely harder said than done.
But what aI;m saying is that I don't agree with Stephen on the subject of goals