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Balian and Baldwin supported Raymond III of Tripoli over Miles of Plancy as regent for King Baldwin IV in 1174, and in 1177 the brothers were present at the Battle of Montgisard, leading the vanguard victoriously against the strongest point of the Muslim line. That year Balian also married Maria Comnena, widow of King Amalric I, and became stepfather to their daughter Princess Isabella. He received the lordship of Nablus, which had been a dower gift to Maria following her marriage to Amalric. In 1179, Baldwin was captured by Saladin after the Battle of Jacob's Ford, and Balian helped arrange for his ransom and release the next year; the ransom was eventually paid by Byzantine emperor Manuel I Comnenus, Maria's great-uncle.

In 1183 Balian and Baldwin supported Raymond against Guy of Lusignan, husband of Sibylla of Jerusalem and by now regent for Baldwin IV, who was dying of leprosy. The king had his 5-year-old nephew Baldwin of Montferrat crowned as co-king in his own lifetime, in an attempt to prevent Guy from succeeding as king. Shortly before his death in spring 1185, Baldwin IV ordered a formal crown-wearing by his nephew at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre. It was Balian himself—a notably tall man—who carried the child Baldwin V on his shoulder at the ceremony, signifying the support of Isabella's family for her nephew. Soon after, the eight-year-old boy became sole king. When he, too, died in 1186, Balian and Maria, with Raymond's support, put forward Maria's daughter Isabella, then about 14, as a candidate for the throne. However, her husband, Humphrey IV of Toron, refused the crown and swore fealty to Guy. Balian reluctantly also paid homage to Guy, while his brother refused to do so and exiled himself to Antioch. Baldwin placed Balian in charge of raising his son Thomas, the future lord of Ramla, who did not go with his father to Antioch.