Parenting With Dignity - Reasons why punishment doesn't work - 0 views
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Punishment will be considered to be any artificially created consequence for a given behavior.
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When a parent resorts to punishment both the parent and the child begin to pay attention to the punishment
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the child is not engaged in creating a new thought process that will bring about better decisions and outcomes next time.
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A child sent to his/her room will seldom or never think about how to behave properly but rather will think about how unfair his/her parents are or some equally negative idea.
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Punishment traps the "punisher" into maintaining the punishment schedule. "You made the rules, now you must enforce them."
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As parents we need to point out the negative consequences inherent in their negative behavior, we do not need to create new ones.
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We can serve as a big help to our children if we help them foresee potential problems and the natural consequences of some of their possible decisions.
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The error comes when we think that the punishment has taught the child what to do in the next situation.
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It has taught the kid NOT to do something… but it has not taught them what to do! That is our job as parents… teach them what to do and how to decide to do it!