Musa Okwonga: 'Boys don't learn shamelessness at Eton, it is where they perfect it' | B... - 0 views
www.theguardian.com/...on-it-is-where-they-perfect-it
private school UK elite class upper class arrogance racism shame network Politics conservative tory
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Boys who look at me like this belong to a class that everyone refers to as “the lads”, and they seem exempt from generally accepted codes of behaviour. The lads intrigue me from the moment I arrive at school. They are fascinating because they seem to defy all social conventions
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I have been told my entire life that it is important to get on with people in order to succeed, but these peers of mine often seem supremely uninterested in that.
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My school never creates the lads – they arrive there with the core of their egos fully formed – but it frequently seems to end up rewarding them with some of the most senior positions in the student body. The lads have long ago worked out, or been told, that what matters is not being good-natured but achieving high office. In a system where boys are raised to be deferential to those in authority, they know that if they merely gain prestige, then personal popularity will follow.
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The school’s power structure is strange to me. The school prefects are not appointed by staff, or elected via secret ballot by their own year. Instead they are chosen by the prefects in the year above. The result is that if a boy wishes to be socially prominent at school, there are only twenty people whose approval he truly needs
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I watch boys campaign for election as prefects with a vigour that I will later see in the world of politics, and I will realise that this is the kind of place where these politicians learned it, that this is what they mean by networking
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Networking is the art of laughing a little longer and louder than necessary at the jokes of the person whose patronage you seek, of standing silently by their shoulders when they are making a nonsensical argument, of hanging around just in case they need an extra pint, of strategically making sure you are in the same place as them on holiday. It is the least dignified behaviour I can imagine, but I will see boys carry it out with such ease that it appears to be genetic.
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I think a great deal about the English concept of fair play: the idea that there are some things that are simply not done. The older I get, the more I wonder how much that concept was created to keep people of a certain social class in their place
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I look at the most confident people in my year and I realise that the greatest gift that has been bestowed upon them is that of shamelessness.
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Shamelessness is the superpower of a certain section of the English upper classes. While so many other people in the country are hamstrung by the deference and social embarrassment they have been taught since birth, the upper classes calmly parade on through the streets and boardrooms to claim the spoils