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1. The roundest knight at King Arthur ’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian. 3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. 4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption. 5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work. 6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery. 7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering. 8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. 9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. 10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. 11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it. 12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, “You stay here; I’ll go on ahead.” 14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me. 15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: “Keep off the Grass.” 16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, “No change yet.” 17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. 18. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. 19. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. 20. A backward poet writes inverse. 21. In democracy it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism it’s your count that votes. 22. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion. 23. Don’t join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects.

The UnknownAs we know, There are known knowns. There are things we know we know. We also know There are known unknowns. That is to say We know there are some things We do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns, The ones we don’t know We don’t know. —Feb. 12, 2002, Department of Defense news briefing

Click on this link.  Directions are in the small box in the UL corner.  Several thousand user-submitted results are stored in the gallery (where the most recent submission is entitled TYWKIWDBI...)

Brazil is one of my favorite countries. Cool people, great music, heavenly beaches, and caipirinhas. But if you have to buy a Mac, you are screwed. And like this graphic shows, it's the same in other places in the world. Brazil wins, however: The price of one MacBook Pro 17" there buys you two identical models in the US. It's the same with other Apple products, so if you can't live without your Apple fix, you better move to another country. I'd take the caipirinhas and the beaches, thank you very much.

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As social networks proliferate, they are changing the way people think about the Internet, from a tool used in solitary anonymity to a medium that touches on questions about human nature and identity. If Facebook were a country, it would be the fourth most populous in the world, just behind the U.S. Almost half of its users visit every day. Nielsen Online reports that social networking (and associated blogging) is now the fourth most popular online activity. Time spent on social-networking sites is growing at three times the rate of overall Internet usage, accounting for almost 10 percent of total time spent online. Social networks can lessen loneliness and boost self-esteem. But they can also have the opposite effect, depending on who you are and how you use these forums.

Globalization and the rise of China owe much to undersea fiber optics and computers capable of managing complex supply chains.

The most exciting part of this phenomenon is that it is just starting. Broadband is beginning to become pervasive in the developed world. Moore's Law will keep crushing the price of computation, communication, transmission and storage. And cheap sensors are about to be thrown on to everything. If it seemed like this already changed much of the world as we know it, get ready for what is coming.

Privacy: By 2020, you will have to go to a museum to understand what it meant. Privacy eroded, due to cameras everywhere and increasing sophistication of data analysis. Most people, considering themselves good at heart, traded it away for the sake of better search results.

I love dirty martinis, but thank god (little “g” on purpose because I’m not fond of  strict rules of behavior and BS dogma regarding a point source deity with a beard who looks like us). I only drink them on weekends – fer now (hee hee!). I used to hate the taste of DMs along with other hoytee- -toytee bourgeoisie (I’m not a communist – I swear!) drinks (e.g. manhattans, cosmos, rusty nails, etc), but a dear friend of mine for over twenty five years introduced them to me a coupla years ago. Did this post have too many parentheses in it? If it did, it’s cuz I’m on my second dirty martini. If U check the date on this post, it’s a Sunday :^).