The best way to empower employees is not to manage them. Coach them to success. This is a process of developing their skills and providing them specific feedback to meet high standards. Employees want to be on the same team with their bosses.

What does work is a) helping people find a deep and very personal vision of their own future and b) then helping them see how their current ways of operating might need a bit of work if that future is to be realized. These are the first two steps in Richard Boyatzis' Intentional Change theory - which we've been testing with leaders for years. According to Boyatzis - and backed up by our work with leaders - here's how people really can begin and sustain change on complex abilities linked to emotional intelligence:

Coaching is conversation. It's about asking questions, listening and being thoughtful about your responses with the goal of learning and development for the person or team being coached. Here, a few things all managers should know about coaching.

Leaders who want to create initiative, leadership, and decentralized action in their organization have to be ready to give up on the idea that they know the best answers.

The only way is to actually delegate parts of your job from time to time, in a controlled manner, to allow them to put theory into practice and demonstrate what they have learned. This gives you, them and the organisation the confidence of knowing when they are ready to take a new opportunity.

You are a talented engineer. You've lead technical research and product development teams. But running a team is one thing. Now you're promoted to a role where leading is just about all you need to do.

Great follow-up conversation about the "key ring"!

No matter how successful a coaching session feels while it's underway, if it doesn't lead to change after it's over, it hasn't been effective. Unfortunately, too many managers don't adequately follow through and thereby squander the important time they've invested in coaching. You can make the process more effective by adopting these practices after every session.

"No one could do anything without my permission." Ryan replied. "I thought I had a great deal of authority."

These are some great coaching techniques to use with your employee's!

Many different perspectives. Some good stuff.

As a manager, you provide some level of coaching to all your direct reports, helping some attain higher levels of professional achievement, and helping others improve their performance to fulfill their current roles. But while every manager should have the capability to coach, you also need to have the ability to discern when coaching isn't working.

Coaching is about connecting with people, inspiring them to do their best, and helping them to grow. It's also about challenging people to come up with the answers they require on their own. Coaching is far from an exact science, and all leaders have to develop their own style, but we can break down the process into practices that any manager will need to explore and understand. Here are the three most important:

Coaching isn't advocating a point. Coaching isn't teaching existing knowledge. Coaching isn't giving what I call "drive by feedback". The standard for coaching is much higher than that. We should be less casual about its use, and hold it in much higher regard.

As I study, learn, use and teach coaching principles I am continually struck by the power of its approach. This article is fascinating and highlights many of the concepts we teach in Leader as Coach at Tweddle University.

"Leaders can provide visible evidence of enabling and supporting their employees by conducting continuous Appreciative Coaching conversations showing how the strengths of the person are aligned to the results of the organization. People then understand how they fit into the organization's vision and mission, but create a powerful energy for excellence."
-James M. Kouzes and Barry Z. Posner, The Leadership Challenge (4th ed., Jossey-Bass, 2008)

I believe most relationships are easily fixed if we have the courage to stop defending our own egos. Anybody can damage a relationship. But it takes courage to fix one-the courage to reach out beyond ourselves to the people we've hurt.

People who are masterful at acknowledgment listen carefully to what is important to others and then look for ways to acknowledge the other person when she has done things or made choices that support those values or goals.  An example of acknowledgment is: "I want to acknowledge the courage it took for you to volunteer to be the spokesperson.  I know that public speaking is a personal skill that you want to improve."

Yes - you are 100% responsible to the complete understanding of your communication to your team!

Another great coaching skill for managers - silence. It's not as simple as it sounds!