Good Communication Begins Within - 0 views
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Carrie Gilfillan on 21 Nov 14written with partner in mind but good to remember when we are helping a student through a conflict situation -- get them to focus on the "I" -- challenge statements that aren't true, where they are imposing judgement or blame "What is not as helpful is to try and impose personal feelings and interpretations on someone else. Stay on your side of the net; express "I" statements about how the situation or dialogue is feeling to you, what you think is important about it, why you want to talk about it-your main intention for having the dialogue. Refrain from "you" statements where you tell your partner what his or her thoughts, feelings, and truths are or blaming him/her for your differences. Then ask open-ended questions: "Who does this happen with?" "What are you feeling when it happens?" "Where in our relationship did this start to be an issue?" "How do you respond when this is going on?" Questions that can be answered with "yes" or "no" are often leading and laced with our personal agenda about what is true."