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I was never going to get married. No amount of wanting it on my end would make it happen, no amount of trying could undo this truth. I was simply not ever going to get married.

Marriage is never perfect nor always imperfect. Perception plays a big role in the happiness of marriage or the unhappiness of marriage. So what makes some marriages last 50 years and less than 6 months? Is the wrong 2 people getting married for the wrong reason? Maybe it's less about people and more about perceptions and expectations. Maybe, just maybe, it has to do with sacrifices or a lack of sacrifice.

No one needs to watch the news every night, unless one is married to the anchor. No one dies proud that they spent their life keeping their house cleaner than anyone else in the family ... If your children grow up to become adults who spend this one precious life in a spin of multitasking, stress, and achievement, and then work out four times a week, will you be pleased that your kids also pursued this kind of whirlwind life? If you want more for your kids (lives well spent in hard work and savoring all that is lovely), why are you living in this manic way?

When I was a mother raising children alone, I possessed one certain Bible. I wrote notes in the margins beside verses that pertained to my circumstances, asking God to apply that truth to my need. My Bible was my diary (much like the little pink one with a lock on it that I hid under my pillow when I was eight years old). Then when I married Rich 25 years ago, I purchased another Bible, one accompanied with fresh-smelling neon markers.

You don't have to be on the A team. You don't have to be on the B team. You don't have to have made the team. You are loved.