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Greve McConnell

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started by Greve McConnell on 03 Nov 13
  • Greve McConnell
     
    The energy behind a communication is determined by our INTENTION. Follow Us On Twitter includes extra information about the inner workings of this hypothesis. In much of the communication between partners, there are two different intentions that can motivate any offered communication: we are often either intent upon co..

    Communication in between partners often gets confusing, and there is a very excellent purpose for this. Dig up further on logo by going to our astonishing article directory. Most of the time, the words we use have far less effect than the power behind the words. Therefore, what you say is usually not what the other particular person hears.

    The energy behind a communication is determined by our INTENTION. In a lot of the communication amongst partners, there are two different intentions that can motivate any offered communication: we are frequently either intent upon controlling the other individual, or intent upon studying about ourselves and our partner. The difference in power in between these two intentions is what frequently creates the confusion in communication.

    For instance, in one particular of my telephone counseling sessions with Joshua, he complained about the truth that his wife, Joan, often gets upset with him over seemingly minor issues. Navigating To wholesale gas price graph perhaps provides lessons you should use with your pastor. A current conflict had occurred over a book she was reading. He had asked her why she was reading that particular book, and she had responded to him with irritation.

    Joshua, I asked, why had been you asking her about the book?

    I was just curious.

    Go deeper, I mentioned. Was there something about the book that was threatening to you?

    Nicely.yeah. It was a book about girls and codependency.

    And what was threatening to you?

    Im afraid of Joan pulling away from me.

    So, which intent do you feel was operating at that moment - the intent to manage her or the intent to find out about yourself and her?

    I guess to be honest, I have to say that I was wanting to handle. When I consider back on it, I feel my tone of voice may have been blaming. Joan always tells me that she hates how considerably I attempt to manage her, and I always believe she is incorrect about that. But I feel I was attempting to manage her.

    And she responded to your intent to control with irritation, which is what is happening regularly in your partnership, appropriate?

    Right. Get supplementary resources on the affiliated URL - Click here: Play the Best MMO, Browser, and Mobile Games for Free. So what would I have said if I was open to learning?

    Its not so considerably the words as it is the energy behind the words. The energy behind the words, Why are you reading that book? is entirely diverse when the intent is to control than when the intent is to understand. The very same words can be said with a blaming, shaming edge, or with real caring and curiosity. It is your intent that determines the power behind the words. Joan was not responding to the words themselves, but to the blaming and shaming behind the words. This is what is causing the confusion for you relating to your communication with her. The precise same words can communicate two completely different issues, based upon the intent. And the chances are that if you had not felt threatened by the book, you might not have even questioned her about why she was reading it.

    Yes, I can see exactly where that is possibly accurate. Okay, I got it. Ive been attempting to manage her and that is what she is responding to, not to the words Ive been using.

    Joshua began to notice his intent. Every time Joan got irritated or distant from him, he noticed that his intent was to control. It was a huge challenge to shift out of attempting to manage her, because he had been carrying out this most of his life in all his relationships, but Joshua was very motivated to alter. He knew that if he didnt, he ran the risk of losing his marriage. He started to concentrate on taking loving care of himself and his own feelings instead of attempting to alter Joan.

    As Joshua became more conscious of his intent, he was capable to consciously shift his intent from controlling to learning about taking care of himself. As his intent shifted, the energy of his communications with Joan shifted, and their connection greatly improved. Joshua was thrilled with the deeper understanding and intimacy that was growing in between them.

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