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isk-adverse in an effort to prevent blows to their self-esteem

Dependency on praise stunts growth, creates a fragile psyche, and even a sense of helplessness that undermines achievement

educe respect for the instructor

praise for effort

praise the process, rather than the product

praise for process is far more effective than praise for product

the goal of education is to reach standards of excellence, not gain teacher approval.

middle-class school deemphasized individual expression and in-depth analysis and rewarded the dutiful completion of specified rote tasks

Some students learn to take orders and others learn to chart a course of action and delegate responsibility.

“hidden curriculum”

When school environments casually yet consistently deemphasize the intellectual benefits of higher education, students become less imaginative about their futures.

College should be “sold” to all students as an opportunity to experience an intellectual awakening.

Access to higher education means that your values and interests can govern your choices.

“My daughter got this in the mail!” he said. “She’s still in high school, and you’re sending her coupons for baby clothes and cribs? Are you trying to encourage her to get pregnant?” The manager didn’t have any idea what the man was talking about. He looked at the mailer. Sure enough, it was addressed to the man’s daughter and contained advertisements for maternity clothing, nursery furniture and pictures of smiling infants. The manager apologized and then called a few days later to apologize again. On the phone, though, the father was somewhat abashed. “I had a talk with my daughter,” he said. “It turns out there’s been some activities in my house I haven’t been completely aware of. She’s due in August. I owe you an apology.”

How do you take advantage of someone’s habits without letting them know you’re studying their lives?

most cues fit into one of five categories: location, time, emotional state, other people or the immediately preceding action.

We’d put an ad for a lawn mower next to diapers. We’d put a coupon for wineglasses next to infant clothes. That way, it looked like all the products were chosen by chance. “And we found out that as long as a pregnant woman thinks she hasn’t been spied on, she’ll use the coupons. She just assumes that everyone else on her block got the same mailer for diapers and cribs. As long as we don’t spook her, it works.”