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Plan in your non-negotiables A young parent asked me the other day how I made time for my family in the midst of my business schedule. I said, “I know I need to get better at this, but I schedule it into my week. Each week my wife and I have a date night! I try to plan in my “play time” with my kids.” I have realized that we spend time doing what is important to us. If we really love our family, we need to choose to spend quality time with them. Now, I am not talking about taking time out of your normal work week, but instead planning in time afterwork or in the evenings to be with the family. I know one guy who when people asked if he was free any time between 5 pm – 7pm, he answered that he was doing discipleship and was unavailable. He was spending that time training his kids in the ways the should go. If you want to learn language, you will need to plan in your language learning times. If you think that they will just happen, I guarantee that something else will pop up and take their place.

Back to the basics – laying a solid foundation! Over the past years of doing ministry in creative access countries, I have found that the real key to a balanced life is abiding in Jesus. If we can spend time quality time with Jesus each and every day, we begin to hear his voice and listen to his heart. Without knowing what HE wants us to do each day, we end up chasing our manmade strategies and plans. Start taking time each and ever day (lavished time) to just listen and learn from Jesus.

You will only learn by practice. Yes, you will do some things you thought God was leading you to do, only to find out by the fruit of it that it was more your thought than his. That's part of the process. How else will you learn? But you'll also get some things right and the joy of that will help tune our heart to his. In the process, you'll be drawn closer to him and come to recognize your more selfish aspirations, and the misplaced trust you have in your own wisdom or abilities.

You can usually tell if someone's listening to Jesus by how open and relaxed they are. If they are closed and defensive when someone questions them, be careful.

One thing I know about people who listen to God, they don't act destructively and they aren't arrogant about what they think they hear. Learning to listen to God is a humbling process. You're never one hundred percent sure of what he's asking. You just have an impulse in your heart you can't explain. It grows over time, but he is never forceful or manipulative, and that is also true of people learning to listen to him. They can be firm, but not defensive and are always willing to sacrifice for others, instead of asking others to sacrifice for them.

God does love you, but that love only transforms you to the degree that you can trust his love enough to follow him on to the narrow road. His love doesn't mean that everything will work out the way we want, nor that we won't be the victims of other people's hurtful and destructive choices.

But he wants to be with us in those moments to help us navigate our experience in a broken world and be transformed through it. He invites us to participate with him, which is why love and obedience go hand in hand in the Scriptures. As you grow to trust his love you will want to obey him, and it's in following him that you get to live in the fruit of his love.

Jesus repeatedly made clear that our actions matter. Scripture often invokes the reality of sowing and reaping to express this truth. How we live either leads us more into his life, or draws us away from it, whether we'll contribute to his redemption in the world, or be part of its destruction. That's what Jesus meant when he affirmed those who followed, Well done! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness! (Matt. 25: 21)

If we follow a bit, the road will get clearer. If we follow our own way instead, we'll lose sight of him.

That doesn't mean you have to be perfect for God to work in you, or that you can't reverse the trend any day you want to. He is always ready to lead you one simple step at a time and never asks for what you cannot give. Following in small things today will open more doors tomorrow. If we're indulgent and dishonest in little things, we will be indulgent and dishonest in larger things. If we can learn to follow him in simple ways of loving others and being true to our word even when it hurts, his work in us will grow in ways we'd never conceive.

This is not about earning his life by our obedience, but participating with him as he transforms us. Everything I get to experience of God today began with simple choices years ago. They set off a chain of unforeseen consequences that opened doors to where I live now. The simple nudge to go to public schools with our children and volunteer to help began a series of opportunities that eventually led to twenty years of consulting public schools on religious liberty conflicts. Listening to Jesus say, "I have more to teach you if you walk away," when my former co-pastor wanted to force me out of the fellowship we helped build together, opened a trailhead into personal transformation I adore and opportunities for growing and sharing I would not have found without him.

At the outset, all these choices looked more difficult than other options I had in mind. I'm glad he won me into following him and the choice to do so now is far easier. I don't even trust my own desires anymore because following him, even though painful at times, has always yielded better fruit.

Learning to merge off of the broad way and onto the narrow road is a process that he wants to work in you, not a requirement he's made for you. It's simply a matter of learning to lean into him a bit more each day and leaning away from what draws you down the broader road. You can't do this alone. And this does not mean you have to carefully listen to Jesus at every moment and try to figure out what he wants so you won't miss out. Doing that will leave you frustrated and exhausted. We find his way much more simply than that. In fact, the anxiety of having to hear him will make it more difficult to do so. Instead go through your day with a growing awareness that he is with you. Whenever you have it, follow that inner sense that seems to encourage you one direction or checks you from going another. When you come up against choices of significance, ask him what he has in mind. Let him show you in his time. You don't have to hear something every day or in every circumstance. Relax in him as he connects your heart with his.

Learning to live out of your spirit, rather than your intellect or emotions alone, will take some time. Ask him to show you the next step ahead and relax in a growing trust that he will. The Spirit makes his direction clear in a variety of ways--it might be that stray thought in your mind, affirmed by something that you read or hear, perhaps even a lyric of a song in the background that resonates with your heart. Don't look for a "voice" per se, but a growing awareness of his thoughts in your mind. Of course, familiarity with his words in Scripture and conversations with others on a similar journey will also bring clarity to what he's showing you.

As I go about my life, I become aware of options that are better than my own, especially in helping someone near me, or drawing me into a quieter space with him. At first, I don't always like where these nudges would lead me, which is why Jesus saw this journey as a narrower road and why most people miss it. Our flesh so easily dismisses what it doesn't want to consider. And, no, you don't have to always get it right. No one does.

As you make a few choices down the narrow road, you will find yourself becoming more relaxed and able to live in the moment instead of trying to manipulate your circumstances. The questions you'll find yourself asking might be these: What does he want to show me about himself today? What might love lead me to do in this situation? How does loving others, even at the expense of my self-interest perpetuate the kingdom? How does my forgiveness or service to someone else today, make the world a better place?

But even when you miss him and find yourself on a path of your own making, he is there, too, still nudging you toward a better road. Don't be hard on yourself, just keep coming back to him over and over. You are loved, even in your brokenness. Today is the day God cares about. As they say, the best time to plant an oak tree was twenty years ago, but the second best time to plant it is today.

As you learn to live more on the narrow road, you'll have a better idea just how destructive the broad way was, to yourself and others. Rather than be embarrassed by it, embrace that new reality. One of the most redemptive things we do on the narrow road is to go back to people we've wronged, seek their forgiveness and offer restitution where we can. Such moments bring great healing and clarity to all involved. Yes, it may not be easy, but that's exactly the point of the narrow road--most fruitful things aren't fun at the outset, but yield great joy later on.

The only reason why his way may seem difficult is because we're so busy following the crowd that we miss his invitation to a narrower road. But once we learn to believe him, it becomes far easier than most think possible. And though you'll find yourself on a road most others can't understand, it will change the way you think, live, and how you treat others. You'll find yourself on a transformative journey that you will never regret.

The reason this journey seems so difficult is because it is far easier than we dare to believe! I know it isn't easy for people to find their way into a loving relationship with the Father. Everything we've learned and believed before runs counter to the dynamics of recognizing and resting in his love. However, it isn't difficult because God makes it complicated, or because it takes a certain skill set or sensitivity, but because we look in the wrong places for how his life takes root in us. But Jesus knows that too, and is still up to the challenge of engaging us in a fruitful relationship with his Father.

Only the religious would twist them either to take pride in thinking they practice the right doctrine or ritual, and delight in the fact that those who don't will get what they deserve. Jesus didn't want to provoke exclusivity or fear with his words, but rather to equip hungry hearts to know how to know him. Following the broad way of self-interest will devour us, but there is a narrower path that will lead us to life.

At first, everything in us wants to resist his nudge. No, it can't be that way. I could get hurt. I could make a mistake. What if it goes wrong? But if he's the one inviting us, we are safer doing what he asks than anything we do to save ourselves. We are not asked to indulge our preferences or live in resistance to them. We are simply called to follow him, in the simplest of choices as best we recognize his invitations. As we do, his life will unfold in us with ever-increasing reality.

Making space for him and his thoughts and following them is the only way off the broader road. We find the narrow road when we find rest in his love for us and then recognize his leading as he offers us a different way to see what's going on around us. We often don't even see a new trailhead until he nudges us towards it.

many Christians fear the responsibility of being free. It's often easier to let others make the decisions or to rely exclusively on the letter of the law.

when we reduced Scripture to formula and a love story to theology, and finally morality to rules. It is a very different thing to break a rule than it is to cheat on a Lover.

What if the guy who sold everything he had to buy the incomparable pearl, was God and you were the incomparable pearl? What if? The context certainly allows for that interpretation, and that is in effect what Jesus did when he gave up everything he had so that we could become his - now and forever!

The local church many have come to cherish - the services, offices, programs, buildings, ceremonies - is neither biblical or unbiblical. It is abiblical - that is, such an organization is not addressed in the Bible

We humans are notorious for taking something Scripture describes as a reality, giving a term to it and thinking we've replicated the reality. Paul talked about the church that gathered in various homes, but he never called it 'house church'. Houses were just where they ended up in their life together. Jesus was the focus, not the location.

I have concluded at this point that the most dangerous enemy of Jesus-brand community is viewing community as an ideal to be achieved rather than as a gift to be received.

We value God's power over human effort, transformation over conformity, mutuality over hierarchy, authenticity over entertainment, modeling over celebrity, following Jesus rather than implementing models, and the presence of the Living Christ above all else!

When religion replaces the actual experience of the living Jesus, when we lose the authority of personal knowing and rely on the authority of books, institutions, and leaders, when we let religion interpose between us and the primary experience of Jesus as the Christ, we lose the very reality that religion itself describes as ultimate.

"Unless a definite step is demanded, the call vanishes into thin air, and if people imagine that they can follow Jesus without taking this step, they are deluding themselves like fanatics... Although Peter cannot achieve his own conversion, he can leave his nets." - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

"Brothers and sisters, break free from whatever ruts you have settled into! Whoever does not want to be set free - well, suit yourself, but don't say you are living in Christ's spirit. You can continue in the old ways and be a part of Christianity, but not of God's kingdom. You can live in Christianity but not in Christ; the gulf between the two is great."

Much Christian leadership is exercised by people who do not know how to develop healthy, intimate relationships and have opted for power and control instead. Many Christian empire builders have been people unable to give and receive love.

Even in its ruined condition a human being is regarded by God as something immensely worth saving. Sin does not make you worthless, but only lost.

You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.

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Jesus knew the worst and He loved me. What a relief to know the worst about yourself and at the same moment to be embraced by God. It's so liberating to reach the end of yourself.

put our intimate friendship with him above everything else we might want from God

real enemy of the cross-life? comes from the established religion of the day

The reward for conformity was that everyone liked you except yourself.

What we need very badly these days is a company of Christians who are prepared to trust God as completely now as they know they must do at the last day. For each of us the time is surely coming when we shall have nothing but God.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic."

That you may experience the powerlessness and poverty of a child and sing and dance in the love of God the Father, the Son, and the Spirit.

Ruthless trust comes down to this: faith in the person of Jesus and hope in his promise in spite of all disconcerting appearances.

The people you'll remember are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the biggest awards. They are the ones who care

Anyone God uses significantly is always deeply wounded... We are, each and every one of us, insignificant people who God has called and graced to use in a significant way

"Since Jesus went through everything you're going through and more, learn to think and act like him. Think of your sufferings as a weaning away from the old sinful habit of always expecting to get your own way. Then you'll be able to live out your days free to pursue what God wants instead of being tyrannized by what you want." - I Peter 4:1-2

My true brothers are those who rejoice for me in their hearts when they find good in me, and grieve for me when they find sin. They are my true brothers, because whether they see good in me or evil, they love me still.

Why not go out on a limb? That's where the fruit is!

The Word of God is like a lion. You don't have to defend a lion. All you have to do is let the lion loose, and the lion will defend itself.

Well, I may not know much about God, but I have to say, we built a pretty nice cage for him

Expectations are resentment waiting to happen.

Religion vs Relational LifeReligion conforms people to a system; relational life frees them to trust God.Religion divides people by preference and perspective; relational life celebrates the incredible diversity in God's family.Religion bores people with routine; relational life is as fresh as a new conversation with an endearing friend.Religion rewards image and pretense; relational life demands honesty and reality.Religion provides substitutes for the active presence of Jesus in people's lives; relational life focuses on that presence alone.Religion sacrifices people for the good of the institution; relational life teaches people how to live together as Father's family.Religion uses what God says and does for its own agenda; relational life allows God to set the agenda and for us to simply follow him.Religion leaves us able to boast about how much we're doing or how hard we're working; relational life finds joy only in celebrating God's work among us.Religion finds love inefficient and cumbersome; relational life embraces love as the heart of God's working.

"Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible."

"So we went to Atari and said, 'Hey, we've got this amazing thing, even built with some of your parts, and what do you think about funding us? Or we'll give it to you. We just want to do it. Pay our salary, we'll come work for you.' And they said, 'No.'" - Apple Computer Inc. founder Steve Jobs on attempts to get Atari interested in his and Steve Wozniak's personal computer."We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out." - Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962.Remember these next time someone tries to steal your dream.

Next time you set out to accomplish great feats, listen carefully. You can hear the voice of the Master, whispering in your ear, "Don't quit. Keep playing."Feel His loving arms around you. Know that His strong hands are there helping you turn your feeble attempts into true masterpieces. Remember, God doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called. And He'll always be there to love and guide you on to great things.

Scientists point out that administratium is known to be toxic at any level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reaction where it is allowed to accumulate. Attempts are being made to determine how administratium can be controlled to prevent irreversible damage, but results to date are not promising.

Judgmentalism is not the same as making judgments. The same Jesus who said “do not judge” in Matthew 7:1 calls his opponents dogs and pigs in Matthew 7:6. Paul pronounces an anathema on those who preach a false gospel (Gal. 1:8). Disagreement among professing Christians is not a plague on the church. In fact, it is sometimes necessary.

This is a book for people like Bell, people who grew up in an evangelical environment and don’t want to leave it completely, but want to change it, grow up out of it, and transcend it. The emerging church is not an evangelistic strategy. It is the last rung for evangelicals falling off the ladder into liberalism or unbelief. Over and over, Bell refers to the “staggering number” of people just like him, people who can’t believe the message they used to believe, people who want nothing to do with traditional Christianity, people who don’t want to leave the faith but can’t live in the faith they once embraced.

Others—and they are in the worse position—will opt for liberalism, which has always seen itself as a halfway house between conservative orthodoxy and secular disbelief.

This is misguided, toxic, and ultimately subverts

It’s a cheap view of the world because it’s a cheap view of God. It’s a shriveled imagination

This bold claim flies in the face of Richard Bauckham’s historical survey: Until the nineteenth century almost all Christian theologians taught the reality of eternal torment in hell. Here and there, outside the theological mainstream, were some who believed that the wicked would be finally annihilated. . . . Even fewer were the advocates of universal salvation, though these few included some major theologians of the early church. Eternal punishment was firmly asserted in official creeds and confessions of the churches. It must have seemed as indispensable a part of the universal Christian belief as the doctrines of the Trinity and the incarnation. (“Universalism: A Historical Survey,” Themelios 4.2 [September 1978]: 47–54)

Universalism has been around a long time. But so has every other heresy. Arius rejected the full deity of Christ and many people followed him. This hardly makes Arianism part of the wide, diverse stream of Christian orthodoxy. Every point of Christian doctrine has been contested, but some have been deemed heterodox. Universalism, traditionally, was considered one of those points. True, many recent liberal theologians have argued for versions of universalism—and this is where Bell stands, not in the center of the historic Christian tradition.

Universalism (though in a different form than Bell’s and for different reasons) has been present in the church since Origen, but it was never in the center of the tradition.

some of these are promises to God’s people, some are general promises about the nations coming to God, and others are about the universal acknowledgement (not to be equated with saving faith) on the last day that Jesus Christ is Lord. Not one of his texts supports his conclusion.

Even a cursory glance at John 14 shows that the through in verse 16 refers to faith. The chapter begins by saying, “Believe in God; believe also in me.” Verse seven talks about knowing the Father. Verse nine and ten explain that we see and know the Father by believing that Jesus is in the Father and the Father in him. Verses 11 and 12 touch on belief yet again. Coming to the Father through Christ means through faith in Christ. This is in keeping with the overall purpose of John’s gospel (John 20:31).

Bell cites Jesus’ words in John 3:17 that he “did not come to judge the world but to save it” (160). This Jesus, Bell says, is a “vast, expansive, generous mystery” leading us to conclude hopefully that “Heaven is, after all, full of surprises.” Bell’s lean into universalism here would be significantly muted had he gone on to Jesus’ words in verse 18: “Whoever believes in him [i.e., the Son] is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God.” Likewise, according to John 3:36, “Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life; whoever does not obey the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God remains on him.”

The Greek word for “unite” is a long one: anakephalaiōsasthai. It means to sum up, to bring together to a main point, to gather together. It is like an author finishing the last chapter of his book or a conductor bringing the symphony from cacophony to harmony. It’s a glorious promise, already begun in some ways by the word of Christ.

The uniting of all things does not entail the salvation of all people. It means that everything in the universe, heaven and earth, the spiritual world and the physical world, will finally submit to the lordship of Christ, some in joyful worship of their beloved Savior and others in just punishment for their wretched treason. In the end, God wins.

If you don’t accept God’s story about the world and resist his love, heaven will be hell for you, a hell you create for yourself. We are supposed to see this in Luke 15 where both brothers are invited to the same feast but one can’t enjoy it. Heaven and hell at the same party (176).

The result is a simplistic formula: “God wants all people to be saved. God gets what he wants. Therefore, all people will eventually be saved.” This is a case of poor theologizing beholden to mistaken logic. If it is “the will of God” that Christians “abstain from sexual immorality” (1 Thess. 4:3), does that mean God’s greatness is diminished by our impurity?

If he’s right, most of church history has been wrong. If he’s wrong, a staggering number of people are hearing “peace, peace” where there is no peace.

Bell figures God won’t say “sorry, too late” to those in hell who are humble and broken for their sins. But where does the Bible teach the damned are truly humble or penitent? For that matter, where does the Bible talk about growing and maturing in the afterlife or getting a second chance after death? Why does the Bible make such a big deal about repenting “today” (Heb. 3:13), about being found blameless on the day of Christ (2 Pet. 3:14), about not neglecting such a great salvation (Heb. 2:3) if we have all sorts of time to figure things out in the next life? Why warn about not inheriting the kingdom (1 Cor. 6:9–10), about what a fearful thing it is to fall into the hands of the living God (Heb. 10:31), or about the vengeance of our coming King (2 Thess. 1:5–12) if hell is just what we make of heaven? Bell does nothing to answer these questions, or even ask them in the first place.

Some Jesuses should be rejected, Bell says, like the ones that are “anti-science” and “anti-gay” and use bullhorns on the street (8). But wherever we find “grace, peace, love, acceptance, healing, forgiveness” we’ve found the creative life source that we call Jesus (156, 159).

At the very heart of this controversy, and one of the reasons the blogosphere exploded over this book, is that we really do have two different Gods. The stakes are that high. If Bell is right, then historic orthodoxy is toxic and terrible. But if the traditional view of heaven and hell are right, Bell is blaspheming. I do not use the word lightly, just like Bell probably chose “toxic” quite deliberately. Both sides cannot be right. As much as some voices in evangelicalism will suggest that we should all get along and learn from each other and listen for the Spirit speaking in our midst, the fact is we have two irreconcilable views of God.

Bell’s god may be all love, but it is a love rooted in our modern Western sensibilities more than careful biblical reflection. It is a love that threatens to swallow up God’s glory and holiness. But, you may reply, the Bible says God is love (1 John 4:16). True, but if you want to weigh divine attributes by sentence construction, you have to mention God is spirit (John 4:24), God is light (1 John 1:5), and God is a consuming fire (Heb. 12:29). The verb “is” does not establish a priority of attributes. If anything, one might mention that the only thrice-repeated attribute is “holy, holy, holy.” And yet this is the one thing Bell’s god is not.

What’s missing is not only a full-orbed view of sins, but a deeper understanding of sin itself. In Bell’s telling of the story, there is no sense of the vertical dimension of our evil. Yes, Bell admits several times that we can resist or reject God’s love. But there’s never any discussion of the way we’ve offended God, no suggestion that ultimately all our failings are a failure to worship God as we should. God is not simply disappointed with our choices or angry for the way we judge others. He is angry at the way we judge him. He cannot stand to look upon our uncleanness. His nostrils flare at iniquity. He hates our ingratitude, our impurity, our God-complexes, our self-centeredness, our disobedience, our despising of his holy law. Only when we see God’s eye-covering holiness will we grasp the magnitude of our traitorous rebellion, and only then will we marvel at the incomprehensible love that purchased our deliverance on the cross.

The pain of hell is our fault. But it’s also God’s doing. Hell is not what we make for ourselves or gladly choose. It’s what a holy God justly gives to those who exchange the truth of God for a lie. The bowls of wrath in Revelation are poured out by God; they are not swum in by sinners. The ten plagues were sent by God, they were not the product of some Egyptian spell gone wrong. God’s wrath burns against the impenitent and unbelieving; they do not walk into the fire by themselves. Bell’s god is wholly passive toward sin. He hates some of it and says no to it in the next life, but he does not actively judge it. There’s no way to make sense of Nadab and Abihu or Perrez-Uzzah or Gehazi or Achan’s or Korah’s rebellion or the flood or the exodus or the Babylonian captivity or the preaching of John the Baptist or the visions of Revelation or the admonitions of Paul or the warnings of Hebrews or Calvary’s cross apart from a God who hates sin, judges sin, and pour out his wrath—sometimes now, always later—on the accursed things and peoples of this world.

Love Wins assures people that everyone’s eternity ends up as heaven eventually. The second chances are good not just for this life, but for the next. And what if they aren’t? What if Jesus says on the day of judgment, “Depart from me, I never knew you” (Matt. 7:23)? What if at the end of the age the wicked and unbelieving cry out, “Fall on us and hide us from the face of him who sits on the throne, and from the wrath of the Lamb” (Rev. 6:16)? What if outside the walls of the New Jerusalem “are the dogs and sorcerers and the sexually immoral and murderers and idolaters, and everyone who loves and practices falsehood” (Rev. 22:15)? What if there really is only one name “under heaven given among men by which we must be saved” (Acts 4:12)? And what if the wrath of God really remains on those who do not believe in the Son (John 3:18, 36)?

Bad theology hurts real people.