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he gradually likes to spend time on pc, first with games, now with painting softs. he is so smart. last night his mother played with him in bedroom. i went to see them after i felt contented with my logo design and want a break. we played catching and wresting and kissing. when i felt enough, i told them i'm to quit to pc. i stayed awhile in the room, when he said he felt sad. at first we thought he meant burning throat, but he insisted he meant sad. that's his first time so clearly claimed his emotion, and that really broke my heart. i then accompany him and tried to explain him that anyone can't always accompany him and every one has his leave, except God, who knows everyone and stayed anywhere at the same time. he didn't comment but went to play game on pc again. his mother accompanied him playing a game of jumping frogs from a game series titled "holy kid games", i love him so much, that only can compared to love for God. i hope he can pardon me for my absence, if there is, in his childhood for busy with my emerging kingdom of China vested from my ancestor. last night he woke me up several times and repeatedly cried for ema's approval not to join kindergarten today. i don't know why kindergarten so hurt him, i only hope in kindergarten he can be more social, i here prey for God let him less pains in his kindergarten and everywhere he is. i know God sees my baby's need and stay intact holy everywhere. i wouldn't do anything against his will. God, let my words run.

these days adding and fine tuned my Google custom search engine and subscribed links. now they all available for ur call. my custom search profile at http://www.google.com/coop/cse?cx=008709734879864335792%3Avfpf2kzejnc , while warren's custom search profile at http://www.google.com/cse?cx=012477955167450946590%3Ae_nc-gavppc . under each custom search engine there 3 or 4 subscribed links, keyword trigger r our Chinese name and English name, our nickname on web, our blogs title, etc. they let ur search for our updates more precise and more apparent in the search result page. here so screenshots. i really like it, hope u can subscribe our custom search engine to let our message arrives more prompt and exact. subscribe warren's custom search: http://www.google.com/coop/trust/add?user=012477955167450946590&sig=__DRJY3R0zEsRqWZy62vFjANuOEks= subscribe ben's custom search: http://www.google.com/coop/trust/add?user=008709734879864335792&sig=__R0KEwQacBlfK84PduoHlbYwMETs= TIA. Google search after logon, returns my subscribed link, which so beautiful.(screenshot 1) http://groups.google.com/group/be21zh/web/subscribedlink.png warren's custom search:(screenshot 2) http://groups.google.com/group/be21zh/web/warrencustomsearch.png my custom search homepage:(screenshot 3) http://groups.google.com/group/be21zh/web/bencustomsearch.png

I had contented with my knol, but yesterday i read an article about automatically registering knol with software, i recognized i need claiming knol under my baby, warren, hope of China, lest his name been occupied by others. i launched and in a brizzle i finished a knol. but when i edit his profile, dog in China surveillance started to break in and let errs upon submission and can't finish the task. later i had to give up and returned home. my home pc's Internet connection these days constantly very slow, esp. surfing with firefox, really a pain. now i know my home pc likely much easier for dog to surveillance on telcom's router, for i spent 3 hours since 6 to 9 pm i can't finished the task editing profile page and publish the submitted knol. without proxy i even can't access google knol site. they fataly blocked my access to knol, and even with proxies, they likely also broke my submission and torn apart the data and result errs. however, in this morning in office, i finished all tasks, in addition claiming knol for my another google account, be21zh.org. fear of hacking and blocking, i prepared all knols contents offline. i indeed prepared them last night, when i restless doubting about how to write about be21zh.org, and God let me dream of his way, to be ur own and no other way to access the unity, except God. God also descended a storm in mid night to inform me. i rightly woke up by it and ema shut down the window. i at once felt blessed. i dreamed of bird shooting. claiming knol under be21zh.org's title quite smooth, with another lan proxy i didn't use usually. i also can fine tuned all my family's knol at leasure, thx God. i see so many beauties in google knol and the web. i love google. here is all my family knols: China Democracy - a knol by ben zhu http://knol.google.com/k/ben-zhu/china-democracy/fr65rgdtqbpx/2 war in world and China - a knol by warren zhu http://knol.google.com/k/warren-zhu/war-in-world-and-china/1wp6j8mgqi178/2 warwinzh, save China from

the interface really cool. i admire the authorship very much. its common but so handy, as to publish by common people equipped with any realm knowledge. i claimed my knol at https://knol.google.com/k/ben-zhu/china-democracy/fr65rgdtqbpx/2# , in title "China Democracy" and embodied my bio details. hope i can see ur comments or review there.

i like vodpod very much, its easy to create ur channels and its functions constantly updating. hope it properous even more. glad to see its becoming more sociable.

my favorite podcast site.

9/4/2010 its my first time since my departure from the village to climbing on the Chinese social ladder by schooling near twenty years ago, that chill even in early summer in raining day so prevailing. within 2 days i cough a lot, and loathed to open my notebook to dig on my web presence. God, the rain surely killing dirt by draining the polluting&poisoning, and saving the thirsty. God, this morning u let me got up lately and talked with u, Masheng, my Japanese Crowned Queen, so many bliss in my life ahead. just in the mid of dirt&challenge from the demon in the front dark house of my dad's old house, some village girl students visited here again. i let them watching animation online and played pc games. its a cloudy day, but warmth resumed, and i likely wouldn't suffer cold since now. last night baby son talked to me, even just let me know that he is busy with bathing and wouldn't talk to me. this morning i dreamed a lot in the adversity he was virtually surrounded. God, u know how i love him, God of Universe, Hope of China. hopefully i can gift him with a new Dell notebook in this year end, which delayed by evil in QRRS, my once and long time employer, with which his&mom and myself, as well as baby son, all improves to a satisfying working and entertaining platform with the hardware. now, time to close this verse, my dear, my beloved, God sees how i missing u, in this anonymous countryside, my heart forever links to u, to the golden moments we shared. i praying with earnest&assurance the coming years will see we live together in our palace that's dream scape. bye. benzrad's comments in these days: Chinese poor quality, including software and ethic. Permanent Link to Chinese poor quality, inc

11/5/2010 yesterday is an important memory for me, in my hometown journey 2nd, for i earnestly talk to and with God, my passed dad. the day just after some chilly raining days, i read most of the day near my dad's old house's front door, which rightly monitored by the evil dark house's owner, the second husband of my early passed aunt, a diligent woman who left me life time memory, a said once bare poor in the village before the new republic China. the demon's window just peeking our front door, just under a slope. the demon polluted me all the day with his tomb chill, so when i felt reading enough, i haunted the village's hall with my camera. but the front square of the village don't gather any interesting young men as usual, so i picked to travel the newly developing wing of the village, where most of the offspring of the dark house owner shifted their houses to, as well as other minor or confluent family trees in the village where almost all residents in family name Zhu. its a fruitful tour, in which my blended memory and anxiousness called forth. the back hill is the main well being source of the villagers, but all that led by my passed dad when he left his factory for injury on his toes in a blast in rocks and returned to the village. he continued his work with steer tools to make use of stones on our back hill for bridges or other building usage, by unearthed them, sorted them, trimmed&polish them for ready brick or block or other frameworks. his works not only support my education which is the best among my sisters and brothers, but forges my best cherished memory and hope and belief and lifestyle on being a man. that occurred amid the transition China opening to the world from deadly locked communism doctrine. the young villagers gradually all follow my dad's lead and improved their lives a lot in these decades by producing tombstone from the hill. but the village, or town, badly need a new business pattern in coming

the ethic of modern China, esp. communist China, sinks into the darkest in China history. the cop/bureaucracy/machine dog system all among the social tissue smothered any humanity of hope. only God of Christian saves China, after the reformation of backbone and in the monstor's corpse from its ruin quite soon. China republic, is totally a premature, an abortion of the sin of seduction by Russian Red.

lingered in office while impatient for action of hometown journey. the company, QRRS, tried to block my plan to equip baby son a new dell notebook for his games while his dad absent from him, by defying withdrawing in advance atop the rich&meaningful travel while i penniless now, likely retreated from the promise i gained in my first contact with a high rank of the company. dog system of China surveillance tried to ruin my joy of the journey, but they doomed to fail. hopefully i will launch in the last day of April, as scheduled&granted by God. God, let me leaving with my acer notebook, and baby equipped with his new toy, a dell Studio 思跃™ 14 (Studio14D-158), a best gift from baby's American pre-engaged. hope baby staying a happy life with all relaxation and business after the department while i enjoy sunburn in my hometown, central China. God, grant the glory and elation we deserve in this brave leaping operation.