Meanwhile, rates of anxiety and depression have also risen in tandem with self-esteem. Why is this? “Narcissists are happy when they’re younger, because they’re the center of the universe,” Twenge explains. “Their parents act like their servants, shuttling them to any activity they choose and catering to their every desire. Parents are constantly telling their children how special and talented they are. This gives them an inflated view of their specialness compared to other human beings. Instead of feeling good about themselves, they feel better than everyone else.”
In early adulthood, this becomes a big problem. “People who feel like they’re unusually special end up alienating those around them,” Twenge says. “They don’t know how to work on teams as well or deal with limits. They get into the workplace and expect to be stimulated all the time, because their worlds were so structured with activities. They don’t like being told by a boss that their work might need improvement, and they feel insecure if they don’t get a constant stream of praise. They grew up in a culture where everyone gets a trophy just for participating, which is ludicrous and makes no sense when you apply it to actual sports games or work performance. Who would watch an NBA game with no winners or losers? Should everyone get paid the same amount, or get promoted, when some people have superior performance? They grew up in a bubble, so they get out into the real world and they start to feel lost and helpless. Kids who always have problems solved for them believe that they don’t know how to solve problems. And they’re right—they don’t.”
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in title, tags, annotations or urlBook: Developing Tenacity by @LucasLearn & @DrEllenSpencer - 1 views
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"What are those key phrases you hear from frustrated teachers in the staffroom during breaks? Or on those rare occasions, you get to meet up with teachers from other schools on training courses? For me it is the following: 'They give up so easily,' 'Where is their stickability?' 'Why do they fear making a mistake?' However it is phrased, you get the gist, that pupils today have no resilience, they aren't prepared to keep going in the face of challenge or set back. They can't think their way around a problem. In discussions with staff within my own school (a large primary in an area of high deprivation in the north of England) I am frequently asked how we can help these children. As part of our school's SLT I have already supported staff to make daring changes to our curriculum but we still seem to be falling short of what we state in our vision; that we want our children to become resilient learners, confident individuals, critical thinkers and lifelong learners. (Traits that I am sure many schools up and down the land wish for their pupils to develop.) Why are our pupils struggling with 'resilience'? What opportunities can we, as a school, provide our children so that they develop these skills? After reading the blurb and the introductory pages, I was, as you can imagine, excited to delve further into this book to see if it could answer some of my questions."
Book: Ten Traits of Resilience by @JamesHilton300 via @BloomsburyEd - 0 views
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"This book is remarkable gem. It is easy to read but offers great challenge and inspiring ideas in a carefully explained and encouraging way. The author draws on his experience, in an honest and true-to-life style. He is open and honest and shares some of his worst experiences in a modest and humble style. As I picked up the book I wasn't sure that resilience was the key feature of leadership that I would have highlighted - I think I would have wanted resilience in my top ten characteristics of good leadership, following other books and courses I've been on I'm sold on the benefits - but I was slightly surprised to find a book putting resilience at the heart. Until I started reading, and quickly I was convinced."
Being happy in Bradford via #BGShappiness - UKEdChat.com - 0 views
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"With a major focus on wellbeing and mental-health among many communities around the UK, staff and pupils at Bradford Grammar School are taking things one step further, with a 'Spotlight on Happiness' focusing on actions that can improve the mental resilience of all. In tandem with the England government's pledge of £1.25 billion to improve children and young people's mental health services, the Department of Health and NHS England published 'Future in mind', with a proposal to encourage schools to continue to develop 'whole school approaches' to promoting emotional well-being and mental health."
Building Resilience in our Learners by @cillachinchilla - 0 views
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"As teachers, one of the biggest challenges that we face in the classroom is students who give up. 'I can't do it', 'It's too hard', 'I dunno'. We spend hours planning a lesson that could stretch and challenge our students, only to find that they don't want to be stretched and challenged because it's too much like hard work. Where do we go from here? How do we make sure that we are molding our learners to be Hobnobs rather than Rich Teas?"
How to Land Your Kid in Therapy - Magazine - The Atlantic - 11 views
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I asked Wendy Mogel if this gentler approach really creates kids who are less self-involved, less “Me Generation.” No, she said. Just the opposite: parents who protect their kids from accurate feedback teach them that they deserve special treatment. “A principal at an elementary school told me that a parent asked a teacher not to use red pens for corrections,” she said, “because the parent felt it was upsetting to kids when they see so much red on the page. This is the kind of self-absorption we’re seeing, in the name of our children’s self-esteem.”
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research shows that much better predictors of life fulfillment and success are perseverance, resiliency, and reality-testing
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Resilience Training in Children - 2 views
Helicopter parents not doing enough to let children fail - 14 views
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children who were becoming less resilient and unable to cope with failure
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someone invented the concept of self-esteem,'' Dr Kefford said. ''In some ways it has been the most damaging educational concept that has ever been conceived.
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That is when we stopped our proper work in the character formation in young people. If we are serious about building resilience, we have to let them fail. It is only through our failings in the learning process that we learn anything
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